Ainslie: Wonderful to be back. Yeah, looking forward to this.

JJ: So, between the first show and the second show, Ainslie sent me “The Old Soul’s Guidebook.” This is your most recent book, right?

Ainslie: This is the most recent, yeah.

JJ: Okay. Now, in all honesty, while I did read parts of The Instruction, I think I told you on our first show, I went straight to the “What’s your soul level?” and I just played with everybody in my life, and who’s what soul level, and continue to refer back to it all the time. So, this was the first time I was reading from start to finish your book. And what we talked about last time, you had given me a soul reading, if you will. You gave me a past life reading, and I thought about that. And some of the things that really kind of struck a chord with me was the freedom seeking and the why. But you mentioned the digestion piece, and I thought to myself, “Well, I don’t have any major digestive issues per se.” But what I’m reading in “The Old Soul’s Guidebook” made me go, “Well, wait a minute. So, if I’m aware of it now…” I’m not having more, but I’m not having less. Let’s just say that. So, the things that sort of upset my stomach or that I have an issue with or that I can’t seem to manage, I think it’s all dietary, but I know it’s not all dietary. One of the things in your book, in “The Old Soul’s Guidebook,” I know you do a lot of past life work with people, and sometimes it is ultra healing, like instantly, just from the awareness. One of the things that I want to talk about today for the people who are listening, yes, there’s the “Please work with him. Get on his schedule. Good luck to you.” Get on his schedule, which I want to do, by the way. But for the people who are not going to be able to, for money reasons, time reasons, what have you, I would love to give some people… And I know you talk about it a little bit on “The Old Soul’s Guidebook,” but on today’s show, I want to talk about when someone has an intuitive hit about a possible issue they’re having that has to be like a soul life or a past life, like “Okay, this is in the past life,” what can we non-clairvoyant people do, if you will? I mean, we are all clairvoyant to a certain degree, but the ones who are less than you. What can we do to help ourselves through one of those ghost pains, I think you called it, right?

Ainslie: Yeah.

JJ: Phantom?

Ainslie: Ghost pains, ghost memories of past life trauma, physical trauma. These things so often show up in the body, and in fairly predictable ways. So, if you do have digestive issues, they’re often related to trauma in the abdomen, being shot, stabbed, something like that. Or it could be eating tainted food, or there could be lots of causes. But anything like that, it could be an injury to your shoulder in a past life, broken leg or something, these things can show up as areas of weakness, especially if you see a pattern or a theme. The typical thing, a sign that it’s got a past life component to it, is that, very often, I hear from clients when I tell them about a past life physical issue, and they’ll say, “Oh my gosh. I’ve seen so many doctors. Nobody can figure it out.” And that’s because it is just a ghost memory, but it often shows up as an area of weakness. So, when people have a trauma to the abdomen in a past life, it may mean that you hold stress in your abdomen. Everything goes there. Or it’s just sort of like an area of weakness. People who have died in a past life with respiratory issues, for example, they’ll tend to have a weakness in the chest. So, if you died of TB in the lungs or pneumonia, then it shows up in this life as a tendency for colds to go to the chest rather than stocking anywhere else. In fact, I was talking to somebody just recently and I spotted weakness in her chest, and I said, “Do colds go there?” And she said, “I’ve had pneumonia so often, I’ve lost count.” She said it’s over 25 times, probably 30. So, you see these things continually showing up. I have a weakness in one foot, and I’ve actually broken it six times. I mean, of course, once you break it, it tends to break a little bit easier. But there certainly is a past life component.

Now, what happens when you find what went on in the past life? What’s the original cause? Sometimes simply by reminding your soul that that was then and this is now, it releases whatever memory is in that part of the body. And that’s why you were saying a lot of the stories I tell, they’re quite dramatic. People overcoming pains and physical issues sometimes just in the moment, like literally. In fact, sometimes what I’ll do is if someone is talking to me about a pain, I’ll ask them before we start doing the work, “Well, where’s the pain on a scale of zero to 10?” And let’s say it’s a 6. Maybe it’s a migraine or something. And then I’ll check at the end of the session, and very often, people go, “Oh my gosh. Well, I don’t seem to notice it.” Like last week, I had somebody, I just said, “Call me tomorrow. Let me know how your pain is.” And she called and said, “Amazing. It just has completely disappeared. It’s gone completely.” And for other people, it’s less, and we’re all different. And how you heal from past life issues, that depends on who you are, and it’s easier for some rather than others. We can all do it. Sometimes it just takes a little bit more work or a little bit more time. Somebody I talked about in my second book who had body temperature issues all related to death from hypothermia in a past life. And she was suffering. Extremely cold body, cold to the touch, always freezing cold, always having to carry a sweater. You’ll see other people who have frozen to death in past lives that they tend to have Raynaud’s disease or cold feet, cold hands, cold backs. And in her case, it took about six months for the shift to happen. But when it did, it was like a lifetime long thing that disappeared just like that. So, sometimes it takes a little bit longer. You’ve got to be kind of patient.

JJ: What would you say… And I know I’m throwing this at you, but you’ve written three books about it, so I feel like you could probably handle this question. What would be the steps? So, there’s the identification or the awareness that it’s possibly a past life issue. And again, sometimes that awareness… And I actually really enjoyed that you said that was then and this is now. Gay Hendricks in his “Conscious Luck” book, that has an exercise that I actually thought of yesterday. “That was then. This is now.” There was a physicality to the exercise which helped to sort of repattern the brain a little bit and to give it a different energetic spin, so to speak. What would be your recommendation past awareness? Okay, this is probably a past life issue. Now what? What can we do?

Ainslie: There’s a number of things you can do. Well, you could have a session with me, but like you said, you might have to wait a couple of years. But I have a membership program, Soul World, so you could join that. We do a past life regression every month. I think that personally, past lives explain everything, so I would say doing a past life regression. If you work with me, I just tell you what happened because I’m in the zone. I don’t regress people. I’ll do that in groups. But I’ll just find out what happened, tell you this, this, and this. And then the soul just kind of processes, makes a connection, and releases whatever it’s holding on to. But you can do your own regressions. People think there’s an awful lot of mystery to these things, but they’re actually relatively simple. You could just go into a quiet space, do a little meditation, and put it out to the spirit world, just say, “I want to see the past life cause of whatever it is.” And then just go with whatever you get. Sometimes it would just be a gut feeling. Maybe you have chronic wrist pain and you find that you were shackled by your wrists at the end of your past life or something. You might just get a sense of it. You might see a visual. Maybe you just get a glimmer of something. You don’t need much just to get that little confirmation.

And then beyond that, I think it’s really important to either talk about it or write about it, or ideally, both. Because the problem is that the soul can’t separate without help of the conscious mind. It can’t separate one life from the others. And this is why past lives affect us now, because we’re carrying these memories. You might be on Life 120, but your soul is on Life Number 1, because it doesn’t die between lives like the body and the mind. So, it sees what happened two lifetimes ago, say, as the way you would see something that happened earlier in this life. You get bitten by a dog when you’re five years old and you’ve got a bit of a fear of dogs now. In some ways, it’s irrational. It’s only because you had some experience that’s way back. We’re doing a similar kind of thing. We’re just kind of saying, “That was then. This is now.” And really, what I love is the way the soul reacts to being reminded is not usually any kind of dramatic, “Oh my gosh. I can’t believe it.” It’s much more a kind of “Okay, great. Thanks for helping me. Let’s move along.” The soul is totally pragmatic about these things. It has no self-pity. It just simply wants to keep improving and growing and healing. And I think this is the fastest way to create really deep healing. And my hope is that… It may take a couple hundred years, but that the past life work makes it into the mainstream enough that when you go to the doctor’s office, there will be somebody like me helping you to deal with the past life issues.

JJ: I agree in terms of I’ve had a few in like a medical intuitive setting, not in just past life, but again, attached to healing, attached to looking at things that are going on and giving some reason to that. So, I would love to see that. And I’ve been a fan of Caroline Myss for years, and I know there’s someone here locally sort of in San Diego in California that I once tried to see, and then I got word of somebody else, and then it sort of just manifested, meaning the next person and then the next person. So, I definitely think that it’s a stone to uncover in the healing journey. For me, when something happens, and if something happens, I’m the “go at it with full force with all the things,” because all the things, whether one works better than the other, all make progress. So, I feel like it’s worth trying all of it because it all has value, and collectively, they all help to make a bigger shift. Because it’s throughout this book.

So, for those of you that don’t know, Ainslie wrote “The Old Soul’s Guidebook: Who You Are, Why You’re Here, and How to Navigate Life on Earth.” And I’ll tell you, I have so many bookmarks in this book, because the 10 soul types and the explanation of what happens when parents don’t want or don’t understand, and they’re trying to sort of shame their child to be more like them, when the true you is not acceptable. And I love learning, so anytime anyone can shed an aha in my life, because I have so many damn tools, I feel like “Someone please give me another one,” because I’m searching and I love it. Not out of obsession or like I don’t have enough yet. It’s just an interesting thought to dive a little deeper from a different angle. And when I looked at the 10 soul types, I have to be honest that I came into a family where I was very wanted. I think I know about my soul contract. I had a past life reading about that once, again, incorporated in a medical intuitive session. And when she said what she said, it did resonate. I didn’t necessarily like the story, but it did resonate. I was like, “Okay, yeah, that makes sense. That feels accurate,” even though it kind of doesn’t sound so good. But I got into the sections in your book, I definitely have been shamed for being a leader, and it’s like I’m reading this book and going, “Man, I’m a little angry.” I’m a little angry because I wasn’t angry before, but now that I’m identifying that I’m really stepping into the leader, and I was definitely told I was too bossy and not everyone has liked me…

Ainslie: I took the liberty of checking in with the spirit guides about two minutes before we started. I said, “Is there anything that you want me to address, or anything at all you want to talk about?” and they said, “Yeah, let’s talk about the leader in you and that you’re working through a past life fear around self-expression…” Hang on. I do have notes. Let me just…

JJ: Ooh, I get notes.

Ainslie: Hang on. Yeah, actually, I got a bit of a past life as well which is related to the self-expression. We can talk about that separately. What I’d like to do is address the whole thing about you being a leader and also how that relates to self-expression. We’ll talk about the past life in a minute. But you were shot down. You learned it wasn’t safe to speak your truth. In this life, you’re going the other way, to a point, the guide said, that you may sometimes blurt or things come out maybe a little bit over-directly. But it’s how you’re working through this as a leader. And your soul type is you’ve got a very strong leader influence. And in a girl growing up, this is the one where you get told that “You’re too bossy. You’re not feminine enough. You should be this.” It’s the antithesis, if you like, of what so many boys get. It’s like “You’re too sensitive. You need to toughen up.” You’re told you’re too bossy and you need to be more feminine. And the thing is that you see the bossy little girl and she’s just learning to use the authority that she’s chosen to come into this world with that might be perfect when she’s leading a Fortune 500 company in 40 years’ time. And if parents or teachers just understood that, if they just understood more about how we come in with this full personality, I think things would be so different. I mean, the education system, I think, should ideally be very different. And what is the point of taking somebody who is meant to be… I’m trying to think of maybe an artist and forcing them to do math. That was kind of my experience growing up, and that felt like wasted time. If they had understood soul types, maybe they’d have sent me to do more art and music than expecting me to excel in science and math, which was never going to happen, by the way. So, we come in… I posted something just the other day. It’s a quote from my first book about how people who think babies are born as blank slates have obviously never met one.

JJ: I did read that part, and I was in agreement because that’s how I use astrology, even before they’re coming in, looking at a child’s astrological profile and having parents say, “Oh, she’ll grow out of this,” and I’m like, “Oh, no, she won’t. This is who she is.”

Ainslie: It’s like, “Get used to it.” I say that to parents sometimes. “Your kid is not going to get any different.” They may learn to suppress things if you keep stuffing it into them. But you are who you are. And a lot of what people go through, a lot of people I work with, a huge bulk of my clientele, is in a narrow age range between 37 and 43, and it’s really to do with the soul pushing through as it’s hitting around 40. The soul, by the point, is going, “We have really had enough of other people’s influence and not being who we are.” That’s why you get a midlife crisis, why you get people changing careers, why you get divorces around that time. It’s like this is when things that were maybe working really well or you thought would be right for you, you find, are not so much. And so, it’s a time of change. It’s a watershed point for a lot of people. And it’s the soul really kind of pushing through and saying, “I’ve got to be me.” And that’s when you see so many people coming into their own. Ideally, you want to do it earlier. Actually, since my new book came out, I’ve had a lot more millennial type clients, so I’m starting to see a lot more people in their 20s and 30s rather than 40s and 50s, which has been [20:37]. And I think the sooner you can do this work, the better, the more you can understand. Because who you are is why you’re here. If you know your soul types, they speak volumes. They tell you everything about the things that you’re here to learn. You, with that strong leader in your personality, you’re here to learn to use your authority. And because you’re working through a fear of self-expression, you’re learning to speak your truth. And you’re learning some lessons in diplomacy as well because every leader has to do that.

JJ: Well, I definitely came in with triple Sag, which is very blunt. So, I’ll just say I’m a Pisces, but the triple Sag is that acknowledgment of I cut through the bullshit and I’m okay that I’m not for everybody. The Pisces part of me wants to be liked by everybody and wants everyone to feel my heart, but I also understand frequency and vibration. And actually, that is why I know parents… Being born into part leader, spiritualist soul type, I didn’t have a lot of leaders around me, so they didn’t know what to do with you. It’s a part that “Yes, we don’t know what the soul types are, but then we don’t have the capacity or the skills (the parents, my parents) to know how to nurture that, to know how to support that, to know how not to shame that.” It’s so different than what they are that, again, it just becomes a misunderstanding. In fact, I read your book, I was reading this section, to one of my clients. As I was reading it, because she was dealing with her son, and she’s a Taurus, and I kept saying, “Please stop trying to force him into what you think is best for him. He has to be what he is.” So, of course, I think she got your book because I was making sure she knew what page it was on. But it is really the fact that, like you said, kids are not born as a blank slate. They come in and you’ve already made an agreement, everybody, by the way. And in my opinion, and from the work that I’ve done, it’s not a parent’s job to mold a child. It’s a child’s job to push the parent into growing into the person that that child needs to be. It’s the opposite learning, not the other way around. It’s not that you’re supposed to tell them what to do and how to do it. It’s literally they’re growing you. And the faster, I think, you understand that as a parent or, let’s say, as a business owner, your business grows you too.

Your business asks you to transcend levels that you haven’t been to before. It asks you to grow in ways, which is what my business has been doing, in ways that’s scary because as a Pisces-slash-quality-time-person, what I lose by being me possibly is I become abandoned, and I have less quality time with people because they don’t have the capacity to handle, or they don’t like my delivery or how I am, my power, so to speak. I know that I’m afraid of my own power. Every time I see a very powerful scene (it happens in a couple different movies), I’m crying and I’m thinking, “I know this is because I’m not fully expressing my power yet.” And people would think you’re not, and I’m like, “No.” But it’s not going to look the same. It’s going to look different than it is now. But I know that’s my next level. And I’m wanting to have this conversation. I’m glad. Thank you for asking your guides and my guides to communicate with you because I literally have the bookmarks in that page of your book. And I think one of the lessons, besides how do we as people, without necessarily help right away, deal with some of the past life issues and allow our body and our souls to know that that was something in the past and this new…what we’re talking about now, whether it be your own soul’s journey that you want to discover and recover, but also understanding, as a parent or as a child, that your parents probably didn’t have the skills, tools, awareness, or consciousness…

Ainslie: Absolutely, yeah.

JJ: …to deal with you. I think my parents are new souls. I think they’re level three. And I think my ex-husband is a level six. I know we had a soul connection. But my boyfriend, my current life partner, Doug, I think he’s a five. I think he got cracked open. I think he’s on the last level of five, because he went from kind of an unconscious five to a much more conscious five in the last three years. And all of this is just…again, it’s just so interesting, because I would have thought…

Ainslie: Oh my gosh. Isn’t it? Yeah.

JJ: Right? And that’s why you have such a flourishing career and life.

Ainslie: There is a dynamic that I see in couples, and this might be what’s going on. I’d have to sort of sit down with my guides and sort of read you both to figure it out, but this is the typical thing is that the older… My clients are mostly women, probably about 95% women, and so it’s typical I’ll be talking to them and she’s level nine, level 10, spiritualist type, she’s on the path, and the agreement she has with the partner, who is a younger soul and often like a hunter or leader type, is that they do the providing, you get to do your thing, your spiritual journey. It works well for a while. It can work well forever. But the downside is that then they start complaining to me that they don’t get any intimacy. It’s a little harder, as an old soul, getting the intimacy that you want from a younger soul, especially one that’s more sort of hunter-leader, that sort of type. But it’s a compromise and it’s a decision. It’s a choice that’s made on a soul level, and it’s usually to give you as much freedom as you can get so you don’t have to focus on survival issues. So, you’re not working 12 hours a day and then having no time to do your stuff. It can freeze you up, often after a life where you’ve really had to work hard and you didn’t get to do the things that you wanted to do. Do you want to hear about your past life?

JJ: Of course.

Ainslie: Okay.

JJ: Who would say no to that?

Ainslie: I don’t know. Yes, who would? Exactly. Let’s have a look at… I just want to remind myself. Okay, I’ll just… Let me get a couple of notes here, but this is where the self-expression issue comes from. It was a past life in France. You were male. I don’t know what era this was. I don’t know how far back it is. The spirit guide said you questioned religion. You were part of the Catholic Church. You questioned what’s going on. I don’t know if you’re in a confessional and you’re sort of saying, “I’m not sure I believe in all this stuff.” And you really came down more on the side of being like an atheist. As a result, you were kind of persecuted in community, actually excommunicated by the church. So, I’d imagine that’s a huge deal, because of course, that creates the fear around rejection. The guides just threw in as an example of how you were treated. They said the windows on your home were broken. People were attacking you. That sort of thing where things were ticked up a little bit.

Now, what happens after an experience like that is that the soul feels it’s not safe to totally express who we are, and then you’ll have these lives maybe where you shut down, you hide your light, because the soul feels it’s not safe. You got unwanted attention. So, this is where you see a lot of people, a lot of my clients have this, where they’re meant to really shine much brighter than they’re doing but they’re afraid of it. It’s really deep down, the soul is saying, “If I stand out, I’ll get in trouble.” And usually, if you can work through that past life fear, it’s all about self-expression, then you find that people are more able to write what they really feel, they could say what’s on their mind, and they don’t have that same fear standing out. And leaders do stand out. Like you, you’re also working through self-expression. So, what happens in this life after the kind of experience you had in France is a tendency to overcorrect, and that’s where that leader… Leaders, when it comes to communication, their style is direct. Like you were saying, you’re very direct.

I always joke that if I had asked my mom… She’s no longer around, but if I had asked her when I was younger, “Am I a handsome guy?” she would have said, “Of course you are.” If I asked a leader type, I would know that I was going to get brutal honesty, so I’d be very careful before asking a question like that, because it would be like, “Do I really want the truth?” You are primed. It’s sort of like you come into the world, you have to speak your truth, you have to say what’s on your mind. And it will get you into trouble sometimes. You just got to make sure it doesn’t trigger that fear and shut you down and go, “Okay, I’m not going to say anything.” Because you’ve probably noticed that people will sometimes ask you for advice, they’ll come to you. What they’re looking for is… This is a leader thing. They’re looking for action steps. I joke about how if a leader type writes a book, it will have a title like “Five Steps to Such and Such” or “Ten Ways to Do Something.” All about action. And so, when somebody tells you about their troubles, asks for advice, they are looking for that leader in you to tell them what to do really. “Have you tried doing this?” or “How about you do that?” And you have to have the confidence to do that. That’s part of the problem. If you’ve had that knocked out of you as a child, then a person might be reluctant to express that. But that’s what you’re here to do, or one of the many things you’re here to do. But it’s how you not only heal yourself, but you help other people as well. And that’s always what’s called a spiritual act: anything you do that heals yourself while you’re helping others.

JJ: Well, I do all of that, and I actually do that all for a living. So, the podcast was the way to express something that I didn’t have an audience for. It was a way to put it out there and have no attachment to… When I was just working with people one on one in person or let’s say as a trainer, exercise or diet-related things, but what I really wanted to talk about was energy and law of attraction and intuition and meditation and past lives and soul contracts. These are the conversations I wanted to have to also connect the body. It wasn’t separate from. I see it all as very connected. It is all very connected.

Ainslie: Exactly, because your soul can’t separate mind, body, and spirit. That’s a really important principle because it explains everything in a lot of ways. Sorry, do continue.

JJ: No. So, for me, I mean, it’s funny we were talking about how I was excommunicated from the church, because I actually have been excommunicated in this lifetime from my family. Not my father and mother and brother, but from the rest of the family, from an incident, a misunderstanding, a misinterpretation, what have you. But anyway, so it has re-emerged. And when it did happen, I asked myself how I attracted this, and I was really honest about the level of conversation, the level of consciousness, the level of experience that I want to have in this lifetime and been working out. I mean, I think I’ve moved enough further away from this, and I feel pretty good about most of the detachments, if you will, that came from that situation. But it was a lifetime of working through some of that. And again, being who I am, it was bossy, it was whatever, it was too much. It was all the things that I am not allowed to do. And no one was interested in talking about any of the things that I want to talk about. And when you mentioned questioning the church, I did that in this lifetime. I was the kid that said, “Why do we go to this church and they go to that church? Why do we drink wine and they drink grape juice? Why do we do this? Why do we fast?” I studied religion as a minor in college because I was curious about why everybody believed something different, and how that came about, and the history of that. So, everything in that past life has literally re-emerged in this life.

Ainslie: When you do it, when you study something in college, I was writing something about this the other day. A client of mine who suffered grief in a past life and again in this life and actually ended up studying grief at college specifically. And that sort of focus is the soul is urging you to try and figure things out. You’re trying to understand your own experience. So, you come in having been kind of abused by the church, or definitely abused by the church there, you’re going to have some pretty strong feelings right from the get-go. I had a similar thing. I was five years old and I remember telling my dad. I remember exactly where we stood when we had the conversation, expecting a lot of pushback. And I just said to my dad, “I don’t want to go to Sunday school anymore. I just don’t believe it.” And he was the son of a minister. I thought, “Oh, here we go.” And he went, “Oh, okay.” It took me years to realize that by me not going to Sunday school, he got an extra hour of bed on Sunday morning, and I think that was why he didn’t argue with me. But right from the beginning, I had a huge problem with organized religion because of my experience in past lives where I’ve been persecuted, I had horrible experiences with people in sort of established religions. I actually declared, at a very young age that I was an atheist. I mean, I was seven years old and going, “I am an atheist.” I barely knew what it was, but I was absolutely determined. And right like that, the weird thing was that I got into my 30s, late 20s, and started getting interested in psychics and meeting psychics. So, I’m holding total cognitive dissonance. I’m an atheist, but there’s this whole spirit world and psychics. I was like weird. It was years before I sort of had my own epiphany and then sort of woke up and went, “Maybe atheist is not the right word. Maybe there has to be something bigger.” It’s just that unfortunately religions are man-made. And I say man specifically. It’s males creating this hierarchy and the structure and the dogma and all of that sort of thing, Jesus or any other prophet or whoever they are. They didn’t sort of set up the church. This is something that happens after they’re here, and it becomes corrupted almost immediately, unfortunately. But I could go on about this all day. Where were we?

JJ: I understand. Well, it’s because there’s so much. Okay, I’m in the middle of reading the book and I want to ask about the digestion. I want to ask about the soul types. I want to just read this for everybody. And by the way, everybody, get “The Old Soul’s Guidebook.” It’s Page 119, “When the true you is not acceptable. Your soul type is your essence, the very heart of who you are. And when your family of origin demands you be something else, it’s an attack on your soul. Each soul type can be described in a [35:38] of terms. These are some of the typical examples of the messages each soul type will hear at some point in their lives.” So, when I saw that you’re too bossy, because in pages before that, I’m like, “Okay, definitely leader is in there,” because there was some shame in claiming that, because I don’t have an example of that, even in my… I didn’t have, I can’t think of anyone in my whole family who demonstrated a benevolent leader with a very strong personality, who was wise, conscious, and Leo-esque, if you will, like taking care of. I don’t know that I have that example.

So, all of a sudden, I mean, it’s actually why I started last year, 2020… Well, 2019, I launched my first mastermind, and it was me taking the mind-body-spirit/mind-body-soul concept into money. And it was bound to happen because I couldn’t find it anywhere else. I literally have created everything I’ve created because I can’t find it the way I want it anywhere else. I don’t see anybody else taking this approach and adding money as another form of energy to the mind-body-spirit/mind-body-soul approach. So, it was all an exchange, like there’s an imbalance, there’s this idea that “I’m going to work really hard and my focus is money,” and I’m like, “Yeah, but money is one thing. Are you going to get rid of your health? Are you going to put your health at risk for money? That’s not worth it.” So, because I couldn’t find it, I created it. And that’s how I’ve always been. Every time I check in with “Do I want to follow that person?” I’m like, “No, I’d rather create it myself.” And for people who aren’t leaders, they look at that and may say, “Well, you’re arrogant and you’re self-centered.” And all the negative jabs that you get. You’re self-centered. You’re arrogant. You think you’re better than everybody. You think you know everything. These are how I’ve been told to calm down, be smaller, don’t be you, don’t allow.

And what’s been really fascinating, I thought before I got into your book where I am now, I thought I was going to ask you about relationships because, like I said, my ex-husband, I think, is a 6, and I knew he was an old soul when we met, and that’s one of the reasons why I married him. And we had a contract, and it was a very specific contract, and it ended when it was supposed to end, and I learned what I needed to learn. But I know that he was an old soul. Now, Doug, not an old soul, but he’s a 5. Yet the things that you talk about, I’m almost racking my brain reading the instruction, going, “There’s no way.” My wings get to spread. I’ve never felt freer. I’ve never felt more supported. I’ve never felt more seen. I’ve never felt more understood than with him, and he’s not even an old soul. So I’m like, “How is this possible?”

Ainslie: Well, it is totally possible because there is, I think, a feeling people get, especially after they’ve read my books. I do try to stress this that it’s not old soul good, young soul bad. And certainly disagreement that you get between souls, a lot of it can be so many things that you touched on. You come in to raise the consciousness of the younger soul. Parents often, even if they’re older, with the younger soul partner, you’re encouraging them. But there’s so many things I could talk about here. One of them, I started talking, there’s about 400 things going off in my head, so I’ve got to rein some of that in. So, okay, where to begin? There’s two things that show up in your life plan, and the important thing always to look at is your motivation, is what you’re doing in your traits and your behavior. Are they coming from a place of fear? Are they coming from a place of love? Which is essentially what’s in your life plan. So, if it’s coming from the leader in you, that’s positive because that’s… Of course, you can slip into intransigence as a leader, and that’s a negative aspect of it, but it’s coming from you. Now, if you were saying, “Oh, I’m terrified of leading. I’m never going to do it,” that’s a past life fear, and you want to get rid of that because that’s not you.

There’s a couple of things, and I was really curious. It was only just in a couple of minutes before we started talking, so I didn’t get a chance to explore with the guides. But you have a mission of love, which is part of this life, and it’s not a thing souls choose all the time. Mission of love is one of 10 missions that your soul would choose to give a little bit of a focus to this life. It puts love on the front burner. You don’t need a mission of love to be loving. So, loads of people can be loving. They don’t have that as a mission, but what it does is it makes love something you’re trying to heal your heart chakra from trauma in past lives. You said you came into a very functional family or something like that, but usually it’s a sign of coming in and not getting the love that you want, because it helps to prevent embitterment. You might have other reasons for choosing it. A lot of it will be about being a loving presence and making sure that what you bring into the world is coming from the heart, it’s caring, but in your leader way.

So, the other thing that shows up, and this is very significant for somebody who’s got the leader, is that you have a mission of self-reliance. Technically, it’s a mission of reliance and it’s a two-sided coin, so you get like reliance and self-reliance. What it means for you is that you’ve come in naturally disposed to be very independent and also very proactive. So, when you’re talking about seeing almost like a gap in the market or something and saying, “You know what, I’ll do something to fill this,” this is the proactivity that comes with being a leader. I mean, a leader who’s functional, doesn’t wait for other people to tell them what to do. Of course, a leader has to be the one who’s saying, “Something’s missing. Something’s wrong. We need to fix it, and make it happen, and do it as effectively and quickly as possible.” So, with the self-reliance and the leader, you are going to be very independent. You’re going to be more independent than the next person. And you’re not going to wait for somebody else to initiate something. You will be a kind of self-starter, if you like, with that.

The problem can be, along with being a leader type, and it can be also associated with past life fears like failure, is an impatience. I’m sure you know this. The feeling of “I just want to get it done, move on to the next thing or whatever.” I will sum it up, when you’re working with somebody, you’re like, “Oh, please don’t make me explain this again.” Or when you’re trying to get someone to do something and you just want to say, “Oh, for God’s sake, just do it. Don’t make me have to explain.” If you think of going back to how you learned to be a leader, a typical example might be you’re on a battlefield, or let’s say you’re hunting or something like that. This could be going back thousands of years and you’re out hunting a woolly mammoth or something. The leaders don’t want to stop and have a group hug, make sure everybody’s feelings are taken care of. When they’re explaining what needs to be done, it’s an economy of words. It’s like, “You go over there, you go over there, and we’ll kill a woolly mammoth and drag it.” It’s not like discussing the philosophy of hunting, going into some sort of long explanation, or maybe saying, “Now, I hope you’re not going to be offended when I tell you this, but I need you to do this.” No, no, no. The leader just wants to say, “You do this, you do that,” and it’s done, quickly and economically.

The problem is, like I said, there’s a need for diplomacy, because you have to learn diplomacy, because the problem with directness could be that when you’re trying to bring other people on board, sometimes they can feel a little bit railroaded, like they don’t know where your thinking came from. And an interesting about you, it happens with a lot of leaders as well, is that you’ve got some very gentle parts for intuitives, spirituals, creator in there. Your processing time is like lightning. It’s way faster than most people. And so, they often don’t know how you came to a decision or feel like you must have just thrown in this thing, pulled it out of your backside. And then they can feel maybe a bit resentful or they don’t cooperate with you because… And they could go even like, “Who does she think she is, bossy and telling me what to do?” So, sometimes you do have to slow down a little bit and kind of bring people on board a little bit, maybe let them know where you’re coming from or take into account some of their feelings. Very frustrating. I mean, when you’re a leader and you just want things to happen yesterday.

JJ: Well, I do have… Again, I’m a Pisces still, and human behavior is something I’ve been studying my whole life, and I teach… In fact, I have an empowerment strategist certification and we’re going through needs and feelings, and identifying and listening to people and to what their needs are. I will say I don’t have any patience for victim mentality. And when I do work with people, I’m an adaptive coach, so I can meet people where they are, and I can work with someone and go through different angles and different aspects and hit it from different sides to try to get to the same decision. But there might come a point where after I’ve tried 10 times and it’s been a year or six months that I’ll say, “You know what, my hands are up and I’m done because you are taking a long time to learn this, and you may never learn this. And I don’t think I’m the right person moving forward for you because I see the problem and I’m helping to have you do that too. It has to be…” Whatever.

Ainslie: That’s a major positive lesson, by the way, for a leader because, like I mentioned, the negative aspect of intransigence. It also is related to just keeping on doing things the same way you’ve been doing it. And if you’re not getting anywhere, it’s really good to know when to cut those…

JJ: Well, you have to learn that, though, right?

Ainslie: Yes.

JJ: I mean, you learn that. And it’s not something intuitive.

Ainslie: No.

JJ: It’s taken me a while to recognize the signs. And I keep fine-tuning, which is really fun. And again, all the other tools I have, like the astrology or whatever, the love languages, core wounds, those all can help a framework of compassion. I mean, it’s why I created an astrology course was to teach people compassion for others and why they’re not like them, and why they look at the world differently, and why they think differently, and why they act differently. And whether it be an excuse or a reason, yes, I have four fire signs. On the human design scale, I’m a manifesting generator. I have a ton of energy and I am super fast. And I recognize, but it took me a long time to recognize, because I used to tell myself, “Well, if they can do it, you can do it.” And that was true. And then when I put that on other people, it came to a point where I was working with a therapist who had said… And I had one or two others before that, working on marital stuff by myself, and the issues, and my triggers, and how could I release this trigger so I could be more present and more loving and not fight back and not cause a power struggle. And one of the last therapists that I had, last traditional therapist, said to me, “You’re gifted.” She goes, “Here’s the problem.” And I was like, “Oh.”

And so, what that did for me was go, “Oh, people aren’t like you.” They don’t process quickly. They don’t see this this way. They don’t assimilate this information. They can’t get out of their own way sometimes. They’re not curious. My parents aren’t curious. It’s a little frustrating sometimes because I’ve sent them books they’ll never read. And if I told them in a conversation, they’d listen, they’d go, “Oh.” I think I told you in the last time, they’d say, “Oh, JJ, you’re real deep.” I’m like, “That’s what I get from my (I think) level three soul parents,” who love me very much and are willing to listen at length for anything I want to talk about, very open and loving, but I yearn for that connection, I yearn for that depth and consciousness and that curiosity and that passion. And that’s what I didn’t get because I didn’t know where to get it from or how to articulate that I needed it. And even if I could articulate it, I wouldn’t have gotten it anyway because that’s not who they are. And it’s learning how to love everybody where they are, but pick your battles for where you want to put your energy and your time.

Ainslie: Oh, totally, yes, because you can’t help everybody, and a lot of people aren’t ready. And it’s hard for younger souls to sort of reach. Older souls understand younger souls better than the other way around. And you’re fortunate to have younger soul parents who are willing even to listen because so many of them, the moment you get into this, they would see it as like a woowoo kind of world. They just switch off. They don’t want to know. It’s not something that’s kind of natural to them. But the wonderful thing, like I said before, is you as the old soul, you can add to their growth, coming in and teaching them other things. I’ve said this to a lot of people over the years. For example, you have very young soul states like Mississippi and Alabama, but you’ve got old souls starting out there. And so, I’ll find typically the old soul gets to about 16 or 18 and bail out for New York or L.A. or something in search of the tribe. And I’ll say to them, “You really elevated the consciousness of your family,” and they’ll go, “I really don’t think so.” And spirit guides say you won’t know until everybody has processed this life and you go to the other side. But trust us, your presence as an old soul really changes things. It makes a huge difference.

JJ: I think I had one, she was a hypnotherapist but she was very clairvoyant and intuitive. This was years ago. She told me that I was here to cleanse the bloodline for my family, which felt good at the time but it felt old soul-ish.

Ainslie: The mission of love is actually…that’s the way I see it. The mission of love is usually what breaks the pattern going back generations. The typical thing, I see this all the time with a parent with a mission of love, they’ll be infinitely more affectionate and more loving towards their children than their parents would have ever been able to be. They literally would not have been able to go there.

JJ: Well, I do know you are correct in, of course, the old soul. Most of the community, I’m guessing, that has stayed with me and is part of my community are old souls.

Ainslie: Oh, yeah.

JJ: And so, guys, really, I mean, yes, I told you to get the instruction also, but you have to get “The Old Soul’s Guidebook.” And I think there’s more work to be done with this, Ainslie, because there’s so much in here. It’s so rich. Even just that one section has permission in it: permission to accept who you really are, permission to… And then anything that comes as a… For me, a resultant of that, getting a little angry about it, even though I know… It’s just more of the “Gosh, I wish I would have known this a little bit earlier.” But I know that it’s all in divine timing. I wouldn’t have started this show, I wouldn’t be where I am if I didn’t have the need for self-expression in an area where I didn’t know who to talk to. So, what did I do? I made a podcast and I put it out to the universe and to the world, not knowing anyone on the other side and not caring or being attached to how anyone would receive it or judge me. And then the magic happened, which was people saying “I love this. It’s changing my life. Oh my god.” And all of a sudden, now they’re coming out of the woodwork, my soul community of people who are similar and resonate with all of this information. And if you’re listening to this show, you’re probably an old soul if you have been listening to me for a while. So, getting “The Old Soul’s Guidebook” could not only help you, but your children and your relationship with your parents and forgiving them for not knowing who you are and not supporting you along the journey because they didn’t know how, because they were of a different soul type and it happened to them. So, again, please make sure to get “The Old Soul’s Guidebook.” And I want them to know more about…you do the group. Tell us about…

Ainslie: Yeah, we have the Soul World community.

JJ: And it’s soulworldsunday.com?

Ainslie: Soul World Sunday, this is what we offer every Sunday. This is a half-hour broadcast. It’s for people who are spiritual, not so much religious, that my wife and I, business partner, or as she describes, my partner in life and in business… So, we present this. This is a free thing we do every Sunday. And I would really invite anyone who’s listening to come and join us. The website will be up in about a day: soulworldsunday.com. Or just go to soulworld.com and there’s links and you can learn about the membership program. But the membership program is a place that…it is community-based as well. We call it Soul World community because we have a very active forum for older, more spiritually conscious souls. And it’s a fantastic place to come and meet people. In fact, we’ve had members who have formed friendships. We’ve been doing it for about seven years now and we’ve had people who have met soul mates, little trios. There’s three of them. I call them the crones. They met each other. It’s been this heartwarming thing. And you mentioned that sort of feedback that you get. We didn’t know what to expect. I mean, honestly, we started Soul World Sunday just over a year ago, thinking, “Well, maybe only five people will listen.” But we feel we just wanted to do something totally altruistic, it’s just from the heart, and just a little bit of the teachings, and answer some questions, and we do a meditation and so on. And the feedback has been absolutely phenomenal. We just get people all the time. This has made the highlight of my week. It’s touched hearts.

So, in the Soul World community, same thing. We have a forum where people are saying this has changed their lives. And especially, I think, so many of us who are on the spiritual path don’t have people we can share the journey with. It could be friends, family who are just not there. My family, I couldn’t talk to them about my stuff. I mean, eventually, you learn you’re not going to get anywhere. I was telling a client today. I actually put it in the book there about when I told my brother back in Scotland that I was giving up illustration to be a psychic. We’re in a pub, he’s got his glass pint up to his mouth, and he just froze. And he looked over the top of the glass at me and said, “So, what’s your website then, barkingfuckingmad.com?” That’s why I actually wanted barkingfuckingmad.com. I was like, “Why not?” So, I didn’t have anybody there I could talk to, and having a community and a place that you can go to where you’ve got a problem or something you want to share, as well as doing classes or regression every month, huge Q&A, daily messages from the spirit guides. We have so much stuff. I mean, what was it? Content-rich, I believe, is the term they use. I mean, if you want to learn about your spiritual journey, come and join us. But the reason I’m so [55:43], I was just really thinking about it this morning, about what an amazing community it’s become. It’s heartwarming. It’s beautiful. I mean, we’re very protective as well. Our moderators are very protective. There’s zero tolerance policy. We’re there to be good to each other and support one another on the journey. So, soulworld.com. Check it out.

JJ: Yeah. Everybody, check it out. I’m going to check out Soul World Sunday also after my move, once I get done with this move, which is happening over the next two weeks. And please, everybody, get “The Old Soul’s Guidebook.” I mean, again, I’m not done with it yet, but there’s enough in here for me to ask Ainslie to come back every day for the next month.

Ainslie: And you know I’d do it.

JJ: Yeah, I know. If you had the time, you would do it.

Ainslie: Absolutely.

JJ: Right, because this is so fun.

Ainslie: Well, it’s a passion, you know. I find it endlessly fascinating just for myself. Even reading clients, I just love it because I learn something new every day. These little connections, the little ways things work together, and how you see these three little elements and how they connect up and tell us so much about what you’re doing. Endlessly fascinating.

JJ: I want to do your chart, because I know you’re Pisces but I would love to know what the rest of that is. Because like you, again, I love when someone can shed a new angle on something and teach me something that I can consider that makes a change. It’s one thing. There are other forms out there, like enneagram and you mentioned human design, but I haven’t brought them into the work yet, or even what is it when you read the…? Anyway, there’s another therapy or kind of intuitive reading.

Ainslie: Like akashic records.

JJ: Yes, thank you. Akashic records. I have a friend who does it, but I haven’t brought it on the show because I haven’t felt the need for it. Maybe it’s just timing. Maybe it isn’t that I need it. I don’t think that all tools are needed or appropriate. You find the ones that work well for you.

Ainslie: Right. Absolutely

JJ: Right. And it’s not that they’re bad. I think maybe human design might be next down the line because there might be value in people understanding that they’re not… I’m a manifesting generator, so the whole energy thing, like if someone is comparing themselves to someone like me and “Oh my god. I can’t keep up with you. You have so much energy.” Well, you’re not built that way. And again, like a soul type, that could present some validation and a little bit of permission to not try to keep up with somebody like me. So, it all has its place. Again, I probably have stopped this book. I’ve read it about four different people, different sections of it already. In fact, my massage therapist was just here and I told her I was interviewing you, because when she saw me at a hotel about a month ago, I had her and another clairvoyant intuitive healer that I’m good friends with and I work with, and we’re looking at our soul types, and we’re all talking about our soul types. And of course, we’re all spiritualists also.

Ainslie: Of course.

JJ: And it’s fun to finally have permission. I have a community like you in that it’s very close-knit, it’s very heartwarming. People feel free to be who they are completely, and they feel supported. But for those of you that aren’t a part of my community, and even if you are, I invite you to check out soulworld.com because I’m going to check it out, and you can’t have enough of us. We want to know that we’re a bigger group than we are. We want to be able to connect with more people. I think it feels hopeful to know that, while we look out into the world and see a lot of young souls mucking it up, which they’re supposed to do, we can rest assured and sort of connect with each other on this, like, “No, we know there’s a new reality. There’s a side of the earth that we’re all holding hands energetically to help bring forward faster.”

Ainslie: There’s a better future there. What we’re seeing at the moment, although it looks like everything is really chaotic, and there’s so much hatred and anger and all the stuff that’s going on, actually, a lot of what we’re seeing is a reaction from younger souls who are afraid of losing… They’re losing the status quo, if you like. It’s no longer that young soul, white man’s world. It’s like it’s changing. And for old souls, it’s a great thing. It’s wonderful, a chance for greater equality and greater opportunity for everybody. I mean, the way the world is, spirit guides say this all the time. The world is never meant to be this way. And we’re going through this huge shift, the transformation, which was actually a theme of my second book. And the transformation is a shift in consciousness that is happening already. But it’s going to sort of like…it will pick up speed and it will really propel us into a more spiritually conscious future. Because if you look at the way the world is, it can’t continue like this. I mean, it literally cannot. We can’t be continuing to pollute the world. We want a world to live in. I mean, we can’t continue treating the world the way we do, or treating people the way we do, or this terrible inequality we have can’t continue. It can’t go on getting worse and worse. At some point, something has to change. And it will be spiritual old souls, like you were saying, spiritualist types, old souls who will lead the way. A lot of healers are doing this already, whether they know it or not. Unfortunately, what you’re getting is like a reaction from the younger souls who are going, “Oh, I don’t like this. I was pretty happy when I was top dog here.” And the idea of greater equality or whatever, that doesn’t appeal. They feel like they’re losing something. It’s a sort of zero sum thing for them. If suddenly everyone else has greater equality, they somehow feel they are going to lose their power or something like that. So, the great thing is that it’s inevitable. It will happen. I mean, I say inevitable, providing we don’t destroy the planet in the meantime. So, fingers crossed and all of that. But it’s going to be a hell of a lot better place for everybody.

JJ: I often live in a reality where I pay no attention to any of it, so when I happen to look into the current reality and get into alignment with what is not right about this, I take the contrast and say, “Okay, what do we want to have happen?” and “Let’s do some work to create that.” And that’s part of why we’re having this show also is to spread the word. I mean, I’ve been doing this show now since 2014, so I’ve been very committed to the journey and to the message. And again, I love all of this, so I appreciate you coming back on the show. And of course, you are welcome to come back anytime and as often as you will allow putting in your schedule. And we could talk about your other book, which I don’t have yet. And we can talk about anything that you want to talk about because I think this is…it’s enlightening, but I don’t mean it in that way. It gives people another perspective to consider, especially on their healing journey, or even in their relationships with people and their self-understanding and self-awareness, because to me, that is definitely what I’m here to help people become a little more self-aware and take back the responsibility of their own power, and to heal themselves, and to get the information, and to have a healthier and happier life while they’re here. And it’s easier to do than you think. It’s just you’ve got a lot of stuff in the way that makes you think you can’t do it. So, I really appreciate your time today.

Ainslie: Well, thank you so much. It’s been an absolutely delight. I really enjoyed the conversation. Thank you so much.