JJ: Today we’re going to talk about the price to pay for living your purpose. Yes, you heard that right. There is a price to pay for living your purpose. And today is a solo show. These lessons were taught to me and were first introduced to me, the concept, probably five years ago on Oprah’s Lifeclass. And this was presented by Bishop T.D. Jakes. Love him. I have his book “Instinct,” and I hope to have him on the show in the near future. And Bishop T.D. Jakes, he didn’t have this listed. He just talked about it. And it hit me so hard back then because of where I was in my life, where I was in my career, where I was in manifesting what I wanted. Because we’re always on a path of realization, right? Contrast creates clarity. We have a yearning. We have a desire. We can recognize our body sensations, be it depression or anxiety or yearning for something different. And we often tell ourselves and surround ourselves with people who don’t necessarily believe as we believe, so we’re constantly challenged in our own belief systems about taking a leap, taking a risk, about living your purpose, and “How do I get there?”

I wanted to share these six concepts that Bishop T.D. Jakes lays out as the price to pay for living your purpose. And for those of you that follow me on Instagram, I’ve made this into a meme. So, you can come over and copy it, share it, download it, print it. I used to have it printed on my wall. I wrote it out, and I had it literally hanging by my computer all the time, because I wanted to remind myself that living your purpose takes courage, living your purpose takes belief and dedication, a desire, and a commitment. And if you don’t have those things, then you’re going to find yourself struggling with depression and anxiety and yearning, as well as probably manifesting all kinds of indicators that let you know you’re not in alignment, that you are not where you want to be yet. And again, there is no end point. Let’s just put that in here right away. There’s no end point. There’s what happens next. There’s like you’re climbing a mountain but the mountain never ends. And it’s not you’re climbing the mountain because you want to get to the top and rest. You’re climbing the mountain because you want to see what’s up there, and you’re curious. And what’s up there is maybe a little bit better than where you are. And when you think about that mountain, and take out the physicality of it for a second and just think about the view, the perspective, as you get closer to the top of a mountain, you have a different perspective on life. You have a different perspective on who you are, on your relationships.

And I believe we all need new perspective all the time. It’s why I incorporate astrology into what I do. It’s why we talk about love languages. It’s why I try to look at relationships and business and concepts from a couple different angles, so one of them will land for you to have a different relationship, a different perspective about your current situation, about your ideas, about who you are in the world, and “How do I get closer to more alignment, to more abundance, to more love and joy, to more feelings of freedom?” Because at the end of the day, I think that’s where we all are going. Law of attraction teaches that the only reason we want anything we want is because we want to feel better when we have it. But as we all know, you don’t have to have it to feel better. And in fact, you have to feel it before you get it. But along the path, people get tripped up over and over again, and sometimes the oversimplification of feeling good, for a lot of you, gets in the way, and you don’t know how to feel good when you have a belief system, or when you have a habit or pattern that keeps stopping you.

And so, today’s show will speak to everybody in every scenario, meaning if you’re a business owner and you want to grow your business, you work for somebody but you want to become a business owner, you’re in a bad relationship or you want a relationship, you are frustrated by your health but you want better health. This will literally apply to every situation. So, please tune yourself to whatever is real for you right now, the thing that you want the most. Or if there’s nothing that you can think of that you want the most, be open to receiving information and your intuition guiding you and telling you. So, what that’s going to feel like is when you hear something, it resonates in your body, whether it be a feeling, like you go, “Oh my god!” or “Yes!” or it’s a resonating of like you feel safe, or you feel relief, or you feel excited and there’s an energy buzzing in you. Those would be indicators that something resonates with you. So, if you don’t have anything top of mind that you’re going to be focused on while listening to today’s show, please just open yourself up to receive the guidance that you need in order to get wherever you’re going to go.

Okay. So, the first price to pay for living your purpose, number one, is you can’t expect to be validated. Too often, people want outside validation before they do anything. Again, me included. Part of before I could step into doing what I’m doing now was about testing out my theories, testing out who I am, how I show up in the world, and seeing who responds and what feedback I get back. Now, part of that is natural and needed, because in order to move forward in life or reclaim or claim a new way of being, whether it be in a business or in a relationship, you have to do it. You can’t think about it. You have to just try it. You have to take that leap of faith and try it, and then see what happens. And as I tell all of my mastermind members and all of my clients, especially those in business, you’re not going to know if you like it or not until you try it. And you are never going to know for sure until you try it, because trying it will give you the feedback that you need to tweak it, to satisfy your need to explore it and then put it down. So, I would invite all of you to remember that whatever that you’re doing in life, you can’t expect others to validate you. At the end of the day, you have to be the one that validates you the most. This is where belief comes in.

And I had done a webinar for you guys, for the community, on building your business with the law of attraction. And one of the “Think and Grow Rich” principles has to do with faith. And I’m going to say faith, decision, persistence, there’s so many good ones. But you have to believe. There has to be a belief. And if you’re someone who doesn’t believe you can get what you want, then that’s unfortunately what’s going to happen. Because you can’t get enough validation from others to fill the hole that you may have of disbelief within yourself. You have to find a way to change the belief. And whether that be by, in business, let’s say reading Entrepreneur Magazine, or reading success stories, or in health and weight loss, reading success stories, buying the magazines, or going online and finding the testimonials of people who have done a life change, a transformation, in a sustainable, healthy way, and how they got there and the story behind that. If it’s having a great relationship, then reading testimonials, listening to podcasts about people who learned their lessons and they healed and they fixed and they transcended their situation.

So, you have to change your belief because the stories that you tell currently are the ones keeping you where you are. But it has to start with your belief in yourself, and it has to start with your dedication to yourself and to living your best life, whatever that means for you. I do want to address that while I want people to take action, and courageous, inspired, I don’t care how scary it is, action towards your goal, that doesn’t mean in relationships or in health, that you give up quickly. In fact, it doesn’t mean you give up ever, actually. It’s not about giving up. It’s about exploring what you’re responsible for and then moving forward. So, number one, you cannot expect to be validated. So, if you are waiting for the people in your life, especially your friends, your family, your co-workers, to tell you that your idea is a good idea, or that, yes, you can do that, especially if your love language is words of affirmation, you cannot put yourself and give your power to others to pump you up enough that will sustain you. You have to do it for yourself. Number one, you can’t expect to be validated. So, if you are a words of affirmation person, you’re going to need to do it for yourself and seek others who will also do it for you. Even if they don’t believe you, but they know it’s what you want and need.

Number two, you can expect criticism when you stretch beyond what people expect of you. The price of change, just in general, is that you have a dynamic in your life that you are used to, and people in your life are used to it also. And everyone sort of fits their pattern, and they know their roles, they know their archetypes. They don’t know it consciously. They know it subconsciously. And they know how the play goes, so to speak, right? Like if you’re all in a play, they know the dynamics. That’s why people, when they leave and get out of certain situations, become freer, because they’re not playing a role that was set up by your family or by your co-workers or by your children or by your husband or your wife. You get to explore what that would look like, and there are no rules or expectations. So, when you start to make changes for yourself, and others feel threatened by that…

Sometimes people feel threatened. I had a client once who was morbidly obese, and her husband waited on her hand and foot. Her husband treated her like a queen in terms of all the things he would do for her. And her son purchased sessions with me as a personal trainer to help her, and nutritionist. So, I would go in and I would work her out in the ways that I could, because we had to buy a Pilates machine on the floor, we did things in the chair, because she was morbidly obese. But what I noticed after months of working with her, I would come up with the most brilliant ways to go around this or ways to get motivated about that, whatever. I’m very good at problem solving. But after I gave her 30 different ways to approach the same situation and realized she wasn’t doing them, I realized that the price to pay for her healing was losing the love and attention she was getting from her husband and her son.

And that was a big moment for me to realize that it wasn’t about me. I had great ideas and any one of them could have worked. But I had to take a step back and look at… And again, this was subconscious for her, not conscious. She would tell you, “Oh my god. Yes, I want to get better. I want to lose weight. I want no joint pain.” But if you go back enough, if you have a broader perspective and you see the dynamic, if she heals, then who needs her? All of a sudden, her relationships change. So, I know subconsciously she’s never going to change, unless her husband leaves her and her son moves away and stops supporting her. So, you can expect to be criticized because you’ll be threatening other people’s view of themselves, their routines, how they expect you to show up for them. And especially if you’re in a relationship where you’ve trained each other to behave in ways that are pleasing to the other one, and you stop doing that, oh my gosh, you’re going to get criticized, because people don’t want you to change because of how it makes them feel.

So, let’s take it in terms of parents or spouses. They sometimes are threatened by your change. I know for me, others in my life were threatened by my changing because they thought I would leave them. So, it became “If you grow past me, you will grow out from me, and we will no longer be together. And we will no longer be friends.” And that’s absolutely true. That is absolutely 100% true. But you can’t stay stuck for other people. I know that you want to sometimes because you’re dedicated to them, and you love them, and you want the best for them. But at some point, you have to notice how it’s affecting you, and how are you suffering, or how is your body or life telling you it is time for you to expand. Now, it doesn’t always mean that the people in your life are going to go away. It just means there’s a risk of that.

I can’t remember who I was talking to. Oh, a podcast mastermind client who said, “I’m afraid that things will change.” And I said, “They will absolutely change.” They’re absolutely going to change when you step into your power, when you release these habits and patterns that keep you where you are. But you keep saying you want this thing that you don’t have. In order to get there, you have to surrender and grow. And we can give it talk time. We can talk about it and say, “Oh, I want that. I want change.” How many people, and maybe you’re one of them, and no disrespect or no judgment, but if you’re in my 30-day manifestation challenge group, which currently there’s like a thousand people in there, and you’ve been part of this community for a while and you’ve done the challenge several times and you’re not in my Inner Circle membership because you think $9.99 is too much, we have a problem. My growth pattern, the things that I’m trying to provide for you are for you to grow, not stay where you are and just make things kind of a little bit better. And I don’t care. You can do whatever you want to do. But what I’m saying is if we come into a group and say, “I want to make more money, yet I can’t find a way for $9.99 a month…” And I recognize not all of you want to be in the Inner Circle membership. That’s not the point. But I know a lot of you would want to be in it, but they think $9.99 is too much money. And my thought is, if you’ve been in this community for a while and we haven’t figured out another way for you to make more income or manifest at a different level, then we’re not using the tools and you’re staying in a pattern.

So, number two was you can expect criticism. And again, this is going to be about your timing in life. How motivated are you to go towards what it is that you want? And how sick and tired are you? Some of you aren’t in pain enough yet. You are comfortable enough. You’re not going to change until either of you manifest something to push you into change, and you’ll say, “Well, I didn’t choose that.” But you did because you were unwilling to do it willingly. You were unwilling to have a voice. I probably have told this story before, but I have a friend who, when she married her husband, he made a lot of money, they worked at the same place, she hated her job, but she was afraid of her mother-in-law judging her because she wanted to have kids and she didn’t want to work and her husband wanted her to stay home. Well, what ended up happening is she got an ectopic pregnancy the first time, and so the doctor had to put her on bed rest. So, this was her way of being validated and justified. “Oh, well, if I get sick and a doctor tells me I have to be on bed rest, a.k.a. I have to quit my job, and now my mother-in-law can’t judge me because I am willingly quitting my job, I am being told because of a medical reason.” And that, honestly, is why a lot of you get sick and hurt. You get sick and hurt for attention. You get sick and hurt because it keeps you where you are. And it justifies the fear you have about taking responsibility for yourself.

So now, I’ve just gone on some big old tangent right now about you can expect criticism. But the bottom line is, at some point in your life, you hopefully will be motivated enough or sick and tired enough to be honest with yourself about what you want and if you’re out of integrity for making that happen and for taking that leap. So, number two is you can expect criticism. And how you deal with it, how you internalize it, how you personalize it or not personalize it, is a lesson to be learned for anyone who wants to grow. It’s just part of the journey. It’s one of the things that you deal with. And hopefully, over the years, you’ve heard me deal with some of the criticism that I get, and hopefully, you can hear how I’ve been growing through it. And it’s not like I’m looking forward to the next criticism, but it’s almost like I’m curious how it’s going to land for me, like, “Hey, is it going to bother me?” Because so many times, it doesn’t because I’ve worked on it. Now, it used to, but that’s again part of the healing journey.

Okay, number three. You can expect turbulence and obstacles, especially in the beginning because you’re rocking the boat. And again, use the butterfly-caterpillar analogy. A caterpillar becomes a butterfly, but the caterpillar has to go through not the easiest of times. First, it has to hibernate, and it has that cocoon, and it’s in that cocoon, and then their body is changing, and then they have to struggle and literally push their way and break through this sheath of the cocoon in order to be released as the butterfly, and to transform and transcend. Growth has obstacles and turbulence, but if you know it’s coming, then you don’t have to fear it. If you know it’s part of the journey, you can relax into it. You can lean into it. There are some people who, when they get into self-growth, they realize that, like many of the people in their life, maybe their job, maybe where they live, there’s so many things that don’t serve them. The frequency and vibration around them don’t serve them. And so, if we try to make peace with and make the best out of a situation that sucks, you will get to a higher frequency but you probably won’t be able to sustain it, because your body is calling to you that you need to be free. You need a better situation. You need a better environment.

And again, I know it’s scary, but you have to take a step back for a second and say, “Why am I here? Am I supposed to just stay stuck for the rest of my life and make peace with this situation that I don’t like, that every time I think about it, it makes me crazy?” And for some of you, it’s going to be yes, because you’re too afraid to do anything else. And that’s when cancer happens. That’s when pneumonia and lung issues of grief, holding onto grief, happen. That’s when back pain happens, because you’re angry at yourself and your life. That’s when you have depression and anxiety, and you think you’re going to get relief out of a pill. “Oh, I have back pain, or depression, or anxiety, so let me take something to make it better.” But you have to change your situation to make it better. These are just Band-Aids.

All right. Number four. You may not have the resources. When I started my business, I did have to go get a loan. But then what quickly happened was that money went way fast and it went right out the door, and I did not manage it well. And this was almost 20 years ago. I didn’t know what the heck I was doing. And so, that all went away. And I also had an expectation, because I had licensed my business, that I was going to get referrals from the people that I was paying to license the business. And that didn’t happen either. They were horrible marketers, terrible business owners. But I wouldn’t have learned that until years later when I had to learn to be one. I would sit up at night at my fax machine, faxing people to try to get clients, to get business, to get PR. It wasn’t a happy place to be, for a couple of reasons. One, I was in scarcity. Two, I had no guidance. Three, I didn’t know what I was doing. I was literally desperate. I was living out of desperation. And all of those energies will not help you attract what you want.

And again, another story that you probably have heard. I had a business partner/friend that started to help me out. He had moved from New York to Los Angeles, and it was a big lesson for me in delegating, in appreciating people, in shame that I had going on about the business. And when I had a personal training business in California, I had multiple trainers in multiple locations, and all the clients would get more than one trainer, for multiple reasons. So, he and I would share a bunch of clients. And then we had a falling out, and then he left, and all of a sudden, I was left with all of his clients. And so now, as I was sitting at my desk for days, searching, hunting for clients, and I hate that energy, by the way. That energy, if you can resonate with that, is horrible and it does not produce results. So, here I am, hunting, searching for clients. I have a potential lawsuit going on with a past trainer who wanted to threaten me because he was stealing my clients, and then he was threatening me for something else. So, all of a sudden, I’m in this stress bubble and now I’ve been literally pushed against the wall. This partner of mine leaving meant I had to take all of his sessions and my sessions, and I didn’t have time. I had to make time because they were my clients, and they were paying clients, and all of a sudden, I literally had no more time to market.

So, it was a Tuesday or a Thursday, and it was one of those…literally, my universe and my world had pushed me and backed me into a corner. I felt like I had no other choice. There was nothing else I could do. So, I opened up a really nice bottle of champagne. I think an 80-dollar bottle of… it wasn’t Veuve. It was another really nice bottle. And I did laundry, because I said, “Screw it. There’s nothing else I can do.” I literally surrendered. And when I surrendered, and when I let go of control, and when I stopped worrying, and when I literally laid down and just said, “I don’t even know how I’m going to do this,” it was actually such a freeing moment that, in that moment, within 24 hours, I got a client to buy a 30-pack of sessions, which was several thousands of dollars, and somebody who wanted to hire me for three full days at the tune of a couple thousand dollars a day. So, all of a sudden, when I let go, all that I had been asking for, all that I had been wanting to manifest literally fell into my lap because I surrendered.

When you tell yourself you can’t afford something versus a show I did a couple of weeks ago called “How Can I?” you’ve told the universe, “No. I can’t do it. I don’t believe in myself. I do not believe in this project. I don’t believe in this relationship. I can’t do it.” And there’s your answer. You will attract and you will create whatever you believe. So, if you want to grow a business and you think that you’re going to do it from a place of “Oh, I’m comfortable. I have this extra cash here…” You know, one of the reasons why you take a risk is because you are committing to the accountability of doing it, of taking the action steps. And without that accountability, the likelihood is you’re not going to do it. So, when you put money to something… I have a story of friends, they joined a mastermind. It was a pretty high-level mastermind. It was twice, if not three times more expensive than the one I have. And they didn’t know where they were going to get the money, but they knew that they couldn’t afford not to do it. They had been repeating their patterns. They were stuck. They didn’t have the resources. They didn’t have a community of support. They didn’t have other people to do a joint venture with or to promote them. They didn’t have a platform, and they needed that help. And they were so scared. And one of the people in the couple is extremely controlling, very controlling in terms of finances and doesn’t take risks, very risk-averse. But they did it. It was almost like they had a nervous breakdown as they were deciding to commit to this mastermind.

And they paid for the first month, and then all of a sudden, because they told the universe, “I’m going to do this because I have to do this, because I can’t be in this situation any longer. We have run out of ideas. We don’t have the support. We don’t have the education. We don’t have all of the resources available to us. We have to, but I’m scared shitless. But we’re going to do it.” And then, within a matter of a month or two months, the universe opened up and clients were flooding in, because they committed. They had a belief, they had a desire, they made a decision, they were very decisive about needing it. Again, they waffled for a while. But it was a great testimonial to taking a risk because you believe in yourself, and knowing that they couldn’t afford not to. Because how many years can you suffer in a situation, whether it be relationship or business, before you’re willing to do something different, before you’re willing to put your money where your mouth is and say to the universe, “I believe in me”?

Be clear. These kinds of investments are not about you investing in the person. Sometimes, that will be an influence, for sure. “Do I feel like they have the skill set? Have they done what I want to do? Do they have the knowledge or resources? Do they surround themselves with high-level people? Do they have balance in their life?” It’s one of the reasons I started a mastermind: because I couldn’t find anybody in my space that does these things. I want to have a law of attraction conversation. I want to have a “come to Jesus” moment about health and wealth. I don’t want relationships to suffer because I’m on a growth path financially. So, I had to create it. And it was scary. And I didn’t know that anybody would take it or do it, and I totally undervalued it and underpriced it. But I knew that going in, and I made peace with that, and I said, “Okay, I can’t know for sure until I try it. Let me try it and see what happens.” And I tried it, and I was really nervous, and then it all worked out. And now I’m at another growth level of, like, “Okay, I understand my value more than I did last year.” So now, the mastermind is more money, and it will be more money next year. And it will probably keep going up as I keep growing. If I keep expanding and be able to scale my business and be able to teach others to do the same, you better believe it’s going to keep going. Now, I might hit an end point at some point, but it won’t be next year, I’ll tell you that, and it won’t be this year, because I see where I’m going and I know it’s possible, and I can’t wait to manifest all that’s happening.

But again, stepping into a new space, claiming a new way of being definitely was scary because of the criticism of “You haven’t done this before. You’re not a business coach.” Yeah, but I’ve been in business 20 years, and I’ve been able to create a lot of things, and I’ve been able to have a sustainable business that I work for myself, and I don’t know too many people that can do that. I was in a podcast mastermind for a little while, and I was the only person who worked for themselves, who made money from their show. And again, these little indications of “You can do this. You can do this. You can do this,” it led me to finally step into “You have to do this,” because otherwise, a part of me in my body was telling me, “You’re not fully expressing your creativity.” It’s one of the reasons why I had fibroids. I had a uterus full of fibroids, for several reasons, but one of them was not expressing who I really am because I was afraid to be criticized, I was waiting to be validated, and I was afraid of the turbulence and obstacles in my way, and I didn’t know if I have the resources. So, there’s the first four wrapped up into my life and into the fibroids, and one of the reasons why I had to go through that.

Okay, two more. Number five. You may not be in a community where this activity occurs. So, I have grown out of several groups over the course of 20 years in business. And one of my financial teachers, I took a workshop years ago, and it was about money, and manifesting money and clients and things like that. And I did the course three times, then I joined her mastermind. And every time I would do the course, I would double my income. And then, every time I would not do the course, I would, again, sort of go back into and revert into old habits and patterns. And so, when I took the course, it was several thousands of dollars, it would work because I was accountable every week to show up and say that I did XYZ. But it also gave me a community of people doing the same thing. And I remember asking her, my teacher at the time, because from early on, when I first heard Abraham say, “You are the creator of your own reality,” I realized, “Okay, this is on me,” and “How do I take responsibility for this?” I was noticing patterns in friendships, noticing patterns in business groups, and I wanted to take responsibility for it. So I said to her, “I keep cleaning house every couple of years. And obviously, the common denominator is me. So, what’s the problem?” And she took one look at me and said, “Honey, you are on a growth path so fast that most people are not going to be able to keep up with you.” And I was like, “Oh, that feels good, kind of. I like that.”

And it’s true. Again, I have four fire signs. I’m a Pisces but I am a Sag moon, and a Sag rising, and a Sag soul, and an Aries Venus. I have a lot of fire and I am fast. And it’s why I learn from people, and if they don’t keep learning themselves and growing and stretching themselves, I outgrow them. And it’s okay. It’s part of a life path. It’s part of what I’m doing. And you guys, some of you have outgrown me. Some of you will outgrow me. And that’s okay. I’m here to serve you in the time and space that you need the messages I’m giving, and then, at some point, you’ll be done and you’ll move on. Or something won’t resonate anymore and you’ll move on. And I acknowledge that. And for those of you who have been listening for six years, I hope that you’ve been growing also. I know that every time I get those of you into a room, I ask, “How many of you have seen me grow?” And most of the time, all the hands go up, because I’m walking my talk. I’m sharing with you what I do and what’s working for me, and I’m telling you the good, the bad, and the ugly of it. And I’m holding the torch for you to grow into who you want to be, and I’m wanting to just nudge you gently and say, “Please don’t stay stuck.”

If you want a better relationship, work on it. Work on yourself. Take responsibility for what you provide and what you’re doing. If you want better health, commit to it. Hire a trainer. Join a gym. Join a group. And do the inner work, by the way. Don’t just do the exercise. Do the inner work. Ask yourself, “Why don’t I love myself enough to commit to regular exercise?” And if you want to grow a business, for crying out loud, join a fricking mastermind. Put your money where your desire is. Because when you pony up and say to the universe, “I’m ready to grow,” I’m telling you, the floodgates will open. You will start to attract and manifest at a new level because you’re breaking the pattern of the frequency you usually have. Your community, for your relationship, the other couples that you hang out with, notice those energies. If you’re single and you’re hanging out with negative women who are jaded, or men, that’s not going to serve you. If you’re in a business or in a company that, again, is full of fear, not going to serve you long term. And if you can’t get out of the situation that you’re in, then you need to find some balance and an outlet somewhere else in order for you to elevate.

One of the things I ask a lot of the mastermind members who are in current situations that are of low frequency vibration, scarcity, and fear, and anger, after the first day, I said, “Do you feel better?” “Oh, yeah, I feel so much better, because I’m in an environment of possibility. I’m in an environment of no ceiling. I’m in an environment of freedom and creativity and support, because I’m not normally in that.”

Because you need a community. Because you have one, whether you know it or not, whether it be your family or your co-workers or your friends. You already have a community. So, the question becomes… I did a podcast in the Inner Circle membership area, because we have a separate podcast, about the five people. You are the sum of the five people you hang out with the most. So, if you’re trying to build a business and you’re with people who are in scarcity and disbelief and fear, and they’re never going to change, then it’s going to be really hard for you to feel inspired and motivated, because you’re not witnessing people growing and expanding. You’re witnessing them staying stuck. So, when you put yourself in a situation where you gravitate towards someone more successful than you, happier than you, healthier than you, you want what they have. Find those people, and be those people.

All right. Number six. You may need to seek new people who are not intimated by your skill sets and gifts. This was the hardest one for me, because, as most of you know, I had a lot of pushback every time I would try to…within my family, within my relationship, within my sphere of influence, within the business groups that I was in. I have pushback, because I was hitting a nerve, and the nerves were true, and they didn’t want it because they didn’t ask for it. And again, that’s my bad. People don’t want your advice unless they’re asking for it, so don’t give it. And if you’re a rescuer and you’re trying to give it anyway, know that that’s about you, that you are looking for validation to feel worthy. You’re looking for validation to say, “Oh, I am good at this.” “Oh, this is something I should be doing.” And while I do believe that you need to find a tribe of people who will respond to you, because that’s what you guys did for me…

And again, look at the way I had to do it. I didn’t come out of the gate swinging, “I’m a law of attraction coach.” I mean, hello? It took me two years of doing Fit 2 Love and sandwiching law of attraction very carefully in between all of the exercise and food and health and hormones and alternative medicine and relationships and psychology. I had to put it in there secretly. And if you go to fit2love.tv, although I don’t know if the site is working right now, if you go to the video, you’ll see me literally give you the out. I’ll basically say, “Don’t listen if you’re not interested.” I don’t even give you a chance to like it. I basically tell you, “Don’t listen to it.” That’s the lack of confidence I had in me stepping into and claiming anything in the law of attraction space. It took all of you that came to the first Releasing What Weighs You Down to literally yell at me for me to go, “Okay, I’ll claim it.” But I was attracting it because I did put it out there, and I put it out there with no intention and no products and nothing. I had nothing for Spirit, Purpose, and Energy when I first put it out. And then I got this huge response back, and I said, “Oh, universe is telling me this is what I should be doing. Okay. That’s not scary.”

Remember that you can’t solve a problem with the same mind that created it. So, until you have a new perspective, until you have a different experience, until you stretch yourself into new results past your comfort zone, it’s going to be a real hard climb trying to change that, because you are set up neurologically, in your brain and in your body, to respond and to stay comfortable and stay safe. And if you want to live your purpose, the price to pay for living your purpose is learning how to do all of these things. One, you can’t expect to be validated. Two, you can expect criticism. Three, you can expect turbulence and obstacles. Four, you may not have the resources. Five, you may not be in a community where this activity occurs. And six, you may need to seek new people who are not intimidated by your skill sets and gifts. Let this resonate with you on whatever level it needs to, and let yourself hear what your next step is.

2020 was literally about clarity. 2020 was about clarity of what’s working and not working. Those of you in bad relationships that had to be quarantined with your other person are now staring yourself in the face and saying, “I can’t do this anymore.” Those of you who hate your job or feel fear because you don’t have security and safety because you realize you could be let go at any minute because the world is constantly changing, and you would like some stability and some safety that you know you can create, even though it scares the crap out of you, you’ve been holding onto this business idea for years and years and years, and now, all of a sudden, you’re being called to step into it and you’re scared shitless. Yep, well, do it anyway. This is the point. Can you keep living the way that you’re living? Can you keep doing what you’re doing? Is your body trying to tell you something?

I’ll just run through, real quick, one more thing before I share with you… What I love to do after every live event is to share with you what people experienced, because you can hear it from me, but it’s more from the people in the room. And last week’s show with Christel, I got a lot of feedback from you about how much you love that show because she does represent you. She was a listener, and now she’s done all my events except one, and she’s in the mastermind, and she’s in the mastermind next year. And she’s very, very involved. And her life has grown. In two years, there’s beensomea huge transformation. And I got a change to talk to her husband at the mastermind because he came out for the last two days, and I asked him, “Do you see a difference in her?” Now, her mother says she’s more confident, and other people recognize things about her, but he said, “Oh, yeah.” Without a doubt, he could say she responds differently and she’s different than she was two years ago, and they’re in a better place because of it.

Decision. You just have to make a decision. Guys, sometimes it’s just saying, “I’m making a decision.” And again, that’s what’s tripping you up is that you’re too afraid to make a decision because you don’t want things to change, but they’re going to. But yet you say you want things to change. You have to decide. Do you want what you see in your mind? Do you want that thing in the future that you keep saying that you want, more than what you have right now? Because it’s okay to say you’re scared and you’re not ready. Just know that there’s going to be physical effects on your body and emotional effects on your body. And don’t be surprised when you’re depressed and anxious. Don’t say, “I don’t know why.” Yes, you do, because you’re not being in integrity. You’re not actually listening to your inner guidance. You are disconnecting, you’re out of alignment, and you’re not actually stepping forward because you don’t feel courageous yet. And I’m going to invite you to stop being afraid and believe in yourself.

Persistence. Yeah. Again, the belief has to be that you believe it, and you love it, and you know it, and you feel it. And you may not know how to get there, and you may not have the community or support or all these things we just talked about, but deep inside of you, you know it. And you’re going to be persistent not in a scarcity way. In a solid belief kind of way. Power of the mastermind. He talks about the mastermind all throughout the book, because, again, it’s like minds coming together to create new realities and new possibilities. And whether it be a mastermind for your business, for your relationships, I don’t care. But get yourself into a group of people who are in a better place than you are, higher-vibrating, whether it be in money, in relationships, or health. And leverage their energy to help you believe it more, help you expand into that next level, so you can manifest better. Sex transmutation. Really, that’s about the sexual energy impulses that you use in all of life. And that applies to relationships as well as business. Subconscious mind and brain, and then using your intuition, the sixth sense as what they call it. And the six ghosts of fear, the things that probably keep stopping you that you allow to keep you stuck are the fear of poverty, the fear of criticism, the fear of ill health, the fear of loss of love, old age, and death.

So, I know I just really fired all those at you, but again, I wanted today to be something that would create clarity for you. Let’s use the last couple of weeks here of 2020. If you are not clear yet… And it’s not clear about what you’re doing, because you’ll hear at the testimonials from some of the ladies in the mastermind, they pivoted completely from where they started at the beginning of the year. Some of them who thought they knew what they were going to do learned that they don’t want to do that anymore, but they had to start to learn that. And I know some of you I’ve talked to who are interested in the mastermind feel like, “Oh, I’m not ready yet.” Well, you’re never going to be ready until you start doing something. And by creating momentum is when you start to have clarity, by testing something, by exploring the inner wisdom that your body has, the ideas, the dreams, the yearnings, the zone of genius. We have enough information for you to start doing something.

So, if you’re on the fence because you think you’re not ready, I’m going to tell you that you’ll probably never really, really be ready, because as everyone has experienced this year in the group, the ones that thought they were ready, not all of them, but many of them, pivoted completely because of what they learned, because of what they experienced, because of what they tried, because of their intuition guiding them in a different direction and having the support to just do it, so that they’re not afraid anymore. They’re not afraid of what they don’t know. You’re not going to know. That’s the point. The creative process and the surrendering and the trust in the universe is that you get guided. Think about that for a second. Just being in the space of alignment and allowing source or God or universe or your mother, your grandmother, whoever is on the other side, literally guiding you to the right next move, I mean, that’s pure leverage. Wouldn’t that feel awesome to just trust that you will be guided to the next best thing?

Because I didn’t know I’d be here. You’ve heard this story 10 times. I didn’t know I’d be podcast coaching. I didn’t know I’d have a mastermind in podcasting. But I’m fricking good at it, and I help people, and I’ve done what so many podcasters haven’t done. I’ve made a lot of money only on my podcast. No ads, no joint ventures, nothing. I mean, I’ve done all those things, but I’m just saying. And now that I can stand in that place and look back and go, “Wow, I’m really good at this. I’m really valuable. What I’ve done is really valuable. And there are people charging four times more than I am for less.” And then I go, “Okay, time to increase the price next year.” And it’s still not where it needs to be, and it’s going to have another price increase in the next year when I have a lot of people who are now making more money on their podcasts because they have the right guidance.

So, I hope that you can hear that I’m on the journey, you’re on the journey, and let’s get started. And you’re going to fail sometimes, and failure is great because it makes clarity for you, it tells you what you should be doing or not be doing. And just know that if you’re feeling stuck in any area of your life, and you have physical ailments telling you it’s time to do something different, I hope today’s show has inspired you to allow yourself to trust and have courage to take that leap, whatever that is for you. And I’m so looking forward to sharing with you a few of the testimonials from the mastermind this year and how people literally pivoted. While people could have said, “Well, this is a bad year to do this because life changes,” it’s actually the opposite. This was the perfect year to do this because now they had guidance and support on how to pivot, versus deciding that circumstances were going to control their outcome. Most of these ladies and their businesses changed because of these circumstances for the better. And I hope that your life also has done the same. I hope 2020 has also showed you so many things and taught you so many things that you are geared up and ready to go and just triumph in 2021.

So now, I’m excited to share with you all the testimonials. Please listen to all of them because these ladies deserve acknowledgment for the things they’ve accomplished in the last year. And even if you do nothing with it, but maybe be inspired by all of them, acknowledge their success, acknowledge their pivoting in what could have been a really tough time, and send them light and love and congratulations energetically because they all deserve it. Every single one of them worked so hard this year and was challenged in ways they never thought they’d be challenged. And all have planted seeds that they are now sowing and looking forward to in coming years.

Dee: Hi, I’m Dee Art. I am a fine artist in Athens, Georgia. And I joined the mastermind at the beginning of the year, kind of not really knowing what direction I wanted to go in. I’m recently retired from corporate America. And I have a background in art and knew that I wanted to kind of go out on my own, have my studio, and all that that entails. But with respect to the business part of it, I wasn’t really sure where I wanted to go. And the thing that I really like about the mastermind is the sense of community and being held accountable for my growth and the direction in which I want it to go. I started off just as a fine artist at the beginning of the year, but with COVID and everything that surrounded that, and the support that I had at the mastermind group, and of JJ in particular, I took the direction of my company in a completely different direction. So now, The Pretentious Collector is kind of a division of myself that is there to support artists, and we had an in-person event. We’re now expanding into consulting and management for artists. So, I’m really excited about where this past year went and, more importantly, where I’m going in the future. And with the help of this group and with JJ, I’m really excited about the future.

Liz: Hi, I’m Liz Wallace and I am part of JJ’s Inner Circle Mastermind. She has helped me to create and start my own very first LLC. I started out with nothing more than having a skill set and an idea in my head of what I wanted to do to help serve in this world. And she has helped me get to the point where I can do that service, help others, and actually have incoming clients and make this into a successful business to help others find clarity, transformation, and freedom in their life. And if it wasn’t for JJ, I wouldn’t have been able to accomplish all that I have in this last year. So, if you’re thinking about it, if you need help to get a push, she will help you definitely get pushed and get started. And she can take you from wherever you are to level up, or she can take you from the seeds of “Where am I going?”

Charlene: Hi, my name is Charlene Parks and I am the owner of Ameka Consulting Group and now, recently, careercoachcharlene.com. And I joined JJ’s Inner Circle Mastermind a year ago. And in that year, I’ve pivoted, I’ve expanded the ideas that I had coming in of what I wanted. It’s totally not where I am, but I needed that. It’s been such a growing opportunity for me. I’ve grown so much. I have very clear vision of what I want. The ladies in the group are so supportive. It’s more than just a business mastermind. It’s support, and supporting you in your personal life, supporting you in business, making friends. You can call someone, “Hey,” if you just need somebody to hear you. It’s the perfect circle to help expand you. And I think this year has just been very eye-opening of what is available for me. Whereas I just was like, “I’m just going to do one thing,” this has really helped me see there are so many options and so many different things I can do. So, if you are a small business owner, woman or male or female, and you’re looking for something that can help you grow in your business, I would highly recommend joining JJ’s Inner Circle Mastermind.

Veronica: Hi, my name is Veronica Turner, and this year I joined JJ’s Inner Circle Mastermind, and I feel like it’s been the greatest decision I ever made. I have gotten accountability, support, and community. I launched my business this year, I have five products, and this is only the beginning. I can’t wait to see what next year brings as I am continuing with the executive membership. So, if you have questions about starting your own business, have ever thought about starting your own business, and you don’t know where to start, join JJ’s Inner Circle Mastermind. You will get love, support, guidance, and accountability. And JJ will help you with your health as well. She is the embodiment of mind, body, and soul, and she will help you connect all three to start your business and keep going forward. If you’ve ever thought about it, now is the time to look into it.

Marjorie: Hi, my name is Marjorie Alexander. I am the eco evangelist and host of “A Sustainable Mind” podcast. I just finished the very first year of JJ’s Inner Circle Mastermind, and wow, what a difference it has made in my life, both personally and professionally. If you are interested in getting support, not just in business and the tools and just pressing the right buttons at the right time, but also addressing things like your personal relationships at home, addressing your health, addressing what you really feel like is your purpose in life. JJ really brings all of that together. It’s an incredibly holistic program in that way. It’s going to bring in all of those different facets to make sure that you can experience success in all of the ways that you’ve dreamt of.

I can definitely say that one of the best parts of this group is the community aspect, not just learning from JJ herself, but all of the different things that all of us bring to the table. We have people that are brand new business owners. Some people have been in business for years and are just transforming what they’ve been doing. There are people that have worked fulltime jobs for many years. And one of the best parts about the Inner Circle Mastermind is that we all come from such diverse backgrounds in terms of our work, our personal life, and where we live in the world, and we’re able to bring that together and learn from one another. I’m walking away with so much support for myself, both personally and professionally, but also lifelong friendships, and you cannot put a price tag on that. If you’re interested in taking the next step in your business or getting started in business, and you just don’t know where to begin, please head on over to JJ’s site. Have that introduction conversation with her. See if this is right for you. But I guarantee you, if you don’t know where to start with business, JJ can help you out. And this is an amazing group of individuals for you to get to know and to take your business to the next level. So, check it out.

Alejandra: Hi, my name is Alejandra with doulajandra.com. I’m a doula and body worker in Austin, San Antonio Area. And I just finished the first year of JJ’s Inner Circle Mastermind. This year has been really transformative for me. I’ve gone from being a contractor, really doing a job, into a business owner, working for myself and serving parents in ways that I was really hoping to do but really didn’t know if I was going to be able to do in one year. The support and the community and getting together with like-minded people over the course of the year has really sort of bolstered my confidence and given me a direction and a path to go down to get to where I was hoping to be and what I really set out to do. The successes that I’ve had in the last year can really be attributed to the learnings that I’ve had from this community and from JJ. If you listen to her podcast, she gives so much great advice just in a broad sense to so many people. So, just put that sort of thinking into what she could do for you one on one, in a really small group setting, and it really does take it to a next level. So, if you are considering at all being a part of the mastermind, I would definitely encourage you to reach out and find out more about what she has to offer. It will really transform your life, both personally and in your business.

Sherry: Hi, I’m Sherry Vic. We’re just finishing up a year of JJ’s Inner Circle Mastermind this weekend here in Santa Barbara. And I have to say that it’s been really a miraculous year for me. I went from just having a small idea of maybe wanting to start a small business to now I have launched two small businesses. So, it’s been remarkable. Because of the way JJ supports you with mind, body, and soul, I’ve also experienced a lot of inner personal growth, and I just feel much more confident and professional and ready to offer my gifts to the world. So, I can’t say enough about how this experience has changed my life. And if you’re thinking about joining the mastermind, or thinking about starting a small business, I can’t think of a better little incubator place to be. It’s just wonderful.

Gayle: Hi, my name is Gayle Manganello. I joined JJ’s Inner Circle Mastermind this past January, and it’s been quite a year. Last year, actually for many years, I’ve been thinking, “I would love to have my own business.” Not really taking it anywhere on my own. I was invited to join a weekend out in California that JJ Flizanes had been running. During that weekend, I learned so much about myself, connecting mind, body, and health. And I also learned about JJ’s Inner Circle Mastermind, knowing that ultimately I would love to have my own business. I thought it was the perfect platform for me to join. It’s been quite a year. I started off with some ideas of what I wanted to do. I’ve spent 30 years in the corporate world. I’ve always been on the real estate side, and I knew I wanted to expand what I had been doing. I was able to join a group of women that were extremely supportive. Learned a lot: laws of attraction and even just down to the basics, social marketing, which was all new to me. So, it’s been quite a journey. I have two businesses now, and I’m looking forward to the continual growth of those businesses, and both of them becoming pretty significant platforms and changing my life. So, if you are someone who’s been thinking about starting your own business, but someone who also wants to be able to connect that with the mind-body health aspect, I would highly recommend joining JJ’s mastermind.

Christel: Hi, it’s Christel Weyerich with healingchristel.com, and I just finished my first year in JJ Flizanes’ Inner Circle Mastermind. If you have not been part of the mastermind, you have got to consider this for your business. With this year being challenging like it is, it was especially helpful. It helped me learn how to pivot my business and work during these pandemic times. My business was in-person mainly, and now I have a new website, I have the marketing tools that I’ve learned with JJ and the others in the group, and it’s been a very successful year for me. What I love about the Inner Circle Mastermind is the accountability, the community, combining both emotional and business. We practice our law of attraction methods also. So, all of it together makes for a successful business.

You know, I really was my own worst enemy. I was in my way. I wasn’t confident in what I did. And I could use these sessions with our group or with JJ to get out of my own way. “Is this just me upper limiting?” So, I learned a lot about upper limits. I learned a lot about stories I tell myself. And I am coming out of this first year more confident than I was walking in. My website is revamped. And I love the ladies in this group. It’s not just a group for ladies, but this year, it was all ladies. And it was a very diverse group. We all had different backgrounds. And just being in that creative space always gave me ideas. I was working with them on different projects and what else I can build in my business. So, the way I was at the beginning of the year versus the way I am now is night and day. So, I cannot wait to continue my second year of JJ’s Inner Circle Mastermind. Thank you.