Today’s show is going to be focused around a bunch of questions that I’ve gotten recently from people who have attended my live event, from people who have listened to the podcast, who have reached out and asked certain questions. And I just felt that it would be better answered on the podcast than for me to write a long explanation. Not to mention that many people do have the same questions, and if I only answer it in a space where there’s only a few people, the rest of you don’t get that answer. So here’s the first question. “How do I (we) remove expectations from others while having high standards and not being walked on or disrespected? How do I accept that my desires are more than what others are? How can I not be disappointed when certain things don’t live up to my expectations of them? I’m trying to remove the expectation but also don’t know yet how to balance that without lowering my standards for myself.” And then the next comment or question that goes with that is that someone also said, “This has been running through my head too. People I’m closest to seem to always be looking at the glass half-empty. I want to meditate and write and learn and explore, and I’m called selfish for wanting to be a more evolved person.” And then the next one isn’t really a question but a complaint about that somebody needs…basically what happens when you have a friend or someone not respect you or disrespect you or reject you, and what happens to us emotionally when that happens.

So those are the three premises we’re going to talk about today on this show. It will be a solo show. I just felt that it was time to give back to you guys in a way that says, “You’re listening. You have questions and I want to give you answers.” I want to give you answers that have worked for me. I want to give you answers based on the reason I started this podcast in the first place. And the reason I started this particular podcast, Spirit, Purpose, and Energy, it came from my original Freedom Fridays from the Fit 2 Love Podcast, and that day was about law of attraction and astrology and numerology and all things spiritually related, life purpose.

So I want to go over a few very specific law of attraction principles. For those of you that attended the live event, I did not cover law of attraction like I wanted to. It’s one of the things that got thrown out. But it will be one of the things that gets put into the next big step in September. We’re having another live event, limited seating, already a fourth full. It’s happening September 20th through the 23rd. And no, I don’t currently have a sales page up for it yet. So if you know you want to come, you can email me and we can work that out. But I will be getting the sales page up by March, so that gives me about 10 days to get that out. But I can’t promise a certain date, but I promise it will be up in March, at least by the first week, preferably right around my birthday or after my birthday. And there will be an early bird special just for the month of March, and then it will go up in April.

So with that said, back to law of attraction. So what got me into the law of attraction originally was this phrase. When I heard Abraham, so for those of you that don’t know, Esther Hicks, who was married to Jerry Hicks, Esther and Jerry discovered Seth. Seth was a group of spirits that were being channeled through Jane. And I can’t remember her last name right now. Anyway, so back in the day, Esther and Jerry had many, many questions, especially Jerry. Esther really didn’t have as many questions. And they searched and searched, and they heard about these different spiritual things, and they did the Ouija board. And Jerry found Jane Roberts. That’s who it is. Jane Roberts was channeling Seth. And so they went to ask questions of what they saw of entities that were being channeled through this woman. And what came out of that was that Seth said to Esther, “You have this ability as well.” So then Esther went off and started to meditate. This was like 30 years ago. And through her meditation process, because she was a super clean vessel that didn’t have a lot of extra junk going on in her mind or vibrations or resistance that would stop her, she started channeling a group of spirits called Abraham. And Esther Hicks has been channeling Abraham for 25 or 30 years.

So there is a whole massive group of people, hopefully you’re one of them, that have found Abraham through either The Secret or way before and have listened to her channel Abraham hopefully either on YouTube or through an audio. I’ve been to a few live events and I would definitely recommend that you look up Abraham, for those of you that want more of what I’m going to talk about on this show. I am not an expert on law of attraction, even though a lot of you think I am. I’ve just been listening to it for 10 years and I’ve been practicing it and studying it, and I’m a really good student. So not only do I listen to something. I actually live it. I caught myself back in 2011 not living it, and I had been studying it since maybe 2004, 2005. And I realized that even though I knew it, I recognized I wasn’t living it. And so I stopped all the behaviors and I stopped doing what was perpetuating the anxiety and the fear that I was in, even though intellectually I understood law of attraction. But I wasn’t living it. So I would say that since 2011, so now that’s seven years, I have definitely been very much more conscious about living from this place as much as possible, which is why we’ve got the 30-day manifestation group, which is why we have Spirit, Purpose, and Energy.

So back to the very first phrase that hit me like a dart through the heart when I heard it from Abraham, and it goes like this. “You are the creator of your reality.” Period. You are the creator of your own reality. So what does that mean? That means that everything in your experience shows up because you are vibrationally in alignment with it. We are vibrational energetic beings, first and foremost. And we have to remember that we are bringing into our experience and we are aligning with our experience whatever it is we’re emanating. We’re like a beacon. We’re like a cell tower and we’re emanating vibrations and frequencies on all different levels about different subjects. And that’s why for some people, they have a belief system about, let’s say, money or relationships or things always working out for them.

I’ve got a friend who, while on one side of the coin, she definitely has investments in real estate and things going on for her, but she believes 100% that she can get things for free all the time. She is in grad school for free. She went to school for free. She’s gotten two scholarships recently because she believes 100% that she can do it and she keeps doing it. Now, that doesn’t mean on other areas of life that there’s a different belief system which then attracts a different result. It’s not that you’re one vibration. You’re not just like happy or sad or frustrated in all areas and then that’s what you attract. You’ve got different frequencies in different areas based on the belief system that you have.

So first and foremost, we have to take responsibility for what we’re emanating. We have to take responsibility for what we’re putting out there, in two different ways. Well, actually, in three different ways. Number one, there’s our subconscious because it’s 88% of your conscious mind, right? If your conscious mind is 12%, 88% is your subconscious mind, that’s a lot more powerful. So some of those belief systems you may not even realize you have are what’s attracting things into your experience. So then you want to use and utilize the things that you’re attracting that you don’t recognize as being your belief system as a way to indicate to you, “Wow. Oh, maybe I have a negative belief about that. Maybe I don’t vibrate very high in this area on this topic.” Look at your evidence of what you’re bringing in to tell you and to guide you to what to do next. It will always work better when you take responsibility for all of it.

Now, that’s the first thing. The second thing is your conscious mind. You have 12% of a conscious mind. That means that you can hear yourself think and you choose your point of focus. Your point of focus also equals your point of attraction. Where are you giving your attention to? So for instance, if you get up in the morning and I stub my toe, in that moment, I’m in pain because I stubbed my toe and I now get that pause, that moment in which I then start to tell myself a story. And I can go in many different directions. One of the directions I can go in that a lot of people go in is once they stub their toe, they’re like, “Darn it!” and they swear and they’re unhappy and “Oh my god. This day started out so bad” and “Now what’s going to happen next?” and “I can’t believe my luck” and “How could I do this?” And that conversation keeps going, which then becomes your point of attraction. So you’re going to keep attracting more things like that because you took that impulse, you took that incident, and you created a new vibration from it which was negative.

Now, on the flipside, you could stub your toe, take a deep breath, and say, “Well, that just let me know that I’m going too fast. And thank you, universe, for showing me that I need to slow down today. I need to slow down so I can enjoy my life, so I don’t miss opportunities, so that I’m in alignment with what I want, so that I notice the things in my experience and I’m aware of my impulses.” That took a whole different turn, right? You get that choice on a conscious level. So no matter how much crap you have in your experience in your subconscious, you still get the choice because you do have that 12% of conscious control of what you focus on, what story you tell yourself, and where it goes. So that’s number two.

Now, point number three is using contrast to help leverage what it is that you want. Again, we’re attracting that which we’re alike and things that vibrate and that resonate with us. So if I believe something really bad about something on a certain subject, whatever it may be, like that things never work out for me, then if I believe that things never work out with me and I’m always… Let’s take planes. How many people do you know just attract either bad drivers or late planes or something happening with travel because they believe travel always goes bad? I know at least a handful of people who believe no matter what they do and no matter where they go, they can’t get there in one straight shot. Something always happens to a plane or a car or something, right? Because they believe, and their experience keeps proving to them that their travel isn’t easy. So if you have the belief that travel is not easy, then you’re not going to have an easy travel.

So how do we change that? Well, first, we have to start softening the resistance to it and allow for us to believe something different because you will keep proving yourself right every time. So we have to examine the things in our life that aren’t working for us, that we don’t like, and what is it that you believe about it? If you are in alignment with your ex-husband giving you difficulties and being a problem, then he’s going to show up as a problem every time because you keep activating that in him. Make sense? Remember, you are the creator of your own reality.

Now, how do we influence others with law of attraction? Because you can. Number one, you can influence others by you aligning yourself with the best parts of who they are. So rather than looking at people and focusing on making the point of attraction on what it is they’re not doing, focus on what they are doing. Do a gratitude list or an appreciation list every day or several times a day about somebody who you’re having an issue with. In fact, I invite you to do this. It will transform your life. You have a problem with somebody. I don’t care who it is. And you keep telling the story. First of all, stop telling the story. Stop telling the negative story because you’re just creating more negative story. Now, in the case of emotional processing, when we need to express how we feel, that’s one thing. If you have emotion bubbling up inside of you, whether it be anger or frustration or sadness, then there’s a need to allow that emotional energy out. And so you’re going to need to express that. So express it. I definitely don’t want you to repress it. Don’t use food. Don’t use tobacco or cigarettes or pot. Don’t numb yourself. Don’t use technology. Don’t be a workaholic. Allow yourself to process and feel your feelings.

Now, once that emotional energy has bubbled to the surface and allowed itself to be expressed, now what do you do about it? Step number two is what do we do about it? Because if you don’t do something about it, if you don’t shift the energy, it will just keep recycling and circling and circling and circling. And you’re just going to keep the same vibration active and keep getting more of what is. Abraham talks about the fact that if we’re focused on what is, what is true, what just happened, what the facts are, what other people could possibly agree with, then you’re just going to keep activating what is. The other choice is to activate what you want. What is it that you want? What are you creating? Because every time you think a thought and you feel a feeling, you’re creating something new. So what is it that you’re creating? Focusing forward, getting more specific, getting excited about what it is that you want to create is going to elevate your vibrational frequency and change what you attract.

So let’s talk about that for a second because it goes back to point of focus. For people that are focused in the past, you’re telling stories about what happened, and for whatever reason. Maybe somebody told you that you needed to do that in order to get better. Well, it’s not working, so stop doing it. You have the option of being present in the present moment, which is what meditation helps us to do. And meditation is great because it can help you release resistance. But meditation isn’t getting you into necessarily a love space or a hopeful space or a super excited, attached, and connected to source energy space. But we can start with meditation to release some of the resistance that we have. And then once we’ve released resistance, then you get to choose where you focus. See, all these negative things that happen to you, you have another choice of becoming a victim or using all these experiences to empower you. And I know because you listen to this show, you want to feel empowered and you don’t want to be a victim. So anytime something negative happens to you, don’t look at it as a mistake or a problem. See it as an opportunity. “What did this show me? Oh, this showed me that I have a negative vibration about this thing.”

Okay. Let me go back to a story that I have about credit card theft and credit cards. Years ago, I had three credit cards (I think two were bank cards and one was a credit card) that were all fraud. There was identity theft on all three cards. I couldn’t buy gas. And of course, that’s very frustrating. And I came home, but the first question I asked myself was “How did I create this?” And I’ll tell you exactly how I created it. Because I’m the person who, when I go to the store and I give you my credit card… Now, if you saw all of my cards, bank cards and credit cards, my picture is on all of them. But I think at the time, maybe one or two of those cards didn’t have pictures on them. And so when someone would say to me, “Can I see a photo ID?” I would take that as negative. I would hear that they don’t trust me, that I look like somebody who would steal. Now, I know a lot of you, “You’re right. Please ask for photo ID” because you feel protected. You feel like the person behind the counter is doing a great job. You feel like they have your best interests at heart, and you have positive feelings and vibrations about that question. I had negative feelings about that question. I would feel like you looked at me and thought that I was capable of stealing someone else’s identity and going on a shopping spree. I felt you don’t trust me. I did not like it. So every time I’d be asked for a photo ID, it would activate a negative, angry, resentful vibration in me. So of course, what happened? I attracted identity theft.

So this is the case in which you can look at it and say, “How did that happen to me?” Then you can have the choice of being worried about it. “Is that going to happen again?” And you go outside of yourself to all those external things you cannot control. You cannot control yet you can influence. So know that things that are coming to you are indicators. They’re indicators of what you’re feeling, what you’re thinking about, and what you believe. They are reflections back to you about what’s going on inside of you.

Now, there are cases where other people, you can absolutely tune into the best part of who they are, but they’re in a really negative state. What you can use law of attraction to do is to align yourself so clearly with the best parts of them. Abraham calls it zigging and zagging, that they zig while you zag. So when you are so strong on being in vibrational resonance with the best parts of them, you don’t connect. The schedule doesn’t work out or you miss each other or you’re only together briefly. But law of attraction can’t line you up if you’re not aligned. Does that make sense? So if I believe something about somebody and I just keep that active within them, that’s all I’m going to attract from them all the time because I’m looking for it. I’m expecting it.

So I want to go back to the question about expectations. It’s twofold. Number one. When you have an expectation of someone to behave in a certain way that feels better to you, we have now taken our power and given it away. We have also deflected and projected that we have something we need, that we’re not getting our own needs met. And for those of you that came to the workshop, this would be the time to pull out your needs and feelings list. There is nothing that the needs and feelings list cannot uncover or help you fix. It doesn’t matter who it’s about. It doesn’t matter how many layers deep it is. But we all have basic human needs.

Now, those of you that didn’t come to the workshop, on the Fit 2 Love Podcast, it’s on a Thoughtful Thursday if you go to the website. Otherwise, I believe it might be Episode 133. You can just go to my website and type in the “three steps to clear communication” or “three steps to constructive communication,” three steps to something about communication or really good, clear communication. And email me. Find me on one of the social media platforms if you need any help with that. But it was a show that I did about nonviolent communication and this needs and feelings list, which is extremely powerful for you too. And I’ll repurpose it here. I’ll put it back on this show a little bit later, but not yet. But I just want you to be able to find it if this feels like something you really want to look at today or you want to take and run with it.

All right. So back to expectations. When I say I have an expectation of you to perform or live in a better way because I care about you, I’m going to call bullshit on that one because this is one of the reasons why when I went back and looked at how I attracted my husband and who he represented in my past or who he represented in my family was my mom. And I had to come to terms with and I learned many years ago that I can’t save them and my attention to them… And not that they both are like having such a hard time or whatever, but just in general. Let’s say it’s about health things or whatever, happiness things. It’s not my job, even though I have all this information. And trust me, I have so many tools. I have been studying tools and I keep studying tools. My toolbox is ginormous and I know I can fix anything. I believe that I can solve any problem because I have so many tools. But that doesn’t mean that because I believe it, someone else believes it. That doesn’t mean because I have those tools, someone else wants it. That doesn’t also mean that it’s my job to do anything about their life. Their life is their journey. They have a contract that they incarnated into in this lifetime for them to uncover what it is they need to work with. And their pace, their path, that’s their journey. And for most people, when it comes to me, their journey is way fricking slower than mine. I’m on a fricking high speed rail. So of course, I’ve had to learn how to allow others to suffer their own consequences.

And it is very hard, but I’ll tell you, for those of you people-pleasers who feel like I do in terms of you know that you have tools, you know that you can do it, you feel empowered in some ways, this is where you’re getting stuck. You’re getting stuck in your own growth when you focus on someone else’s behavior because you are attaching it to your life and saying, “If they aren’t better, I need to fix them” or “I need to help them” or “My life would feel better if I helped them get to a better place.” You know what? You may. But what is it about your journey? What’s stopping you from focusing on you? Remember, you are the creator of your own reality. What is it that you need? What is it that you want? And what is stopping you, or what resistance do you have to moving forward in your life?

The best way to influence others is to be an example and to allow others to go at their own pace. And I know for a lot of people, it’s hard. It was hard for me to learn, but it’s definitely a lesson that I’ve learned in my marriage, of allowing others to go at their own pace because some people, most people, I mean, my mother and dad are the same way. My father is a beautiful, slow-moving, methodical, grounded, simple, beautiful, full of love man, but he’s kind of slow. He’s not fast. My mother is very fast. So she had to learn it too. I’ve taken it to another level of spiritual learning and attraction, but it is a lesson for you to learn.

And maybe this is the time to look around at the people around you. Allow them to have their negative judgments about you. Recognize that it’s not about you. When someone calls you selfish because you want to evolve, it just means they feel threatened. It just means they feel like you’re either going to leave them because you’re going to uncover that they aren’t evolved or they feel like you’re going to raise the bar and they don’t want to do the work. But it comes down to their insecurity and they’re just projecting onto you. Anytime someone has a negative opinion about you, it’s not about you. So when you feel negative emotion because you heard it and you feel hurt, know that that though is about you. That pain, that wound is yours to heal. And when you start to go into and heal some of those wounds that you have about yourself and the beliefs that you have about yourself, because when someone says something about you…

So let’s take the selfish. Someone calls you selfish. If you know that to be true or if you believe it might be true, it probably is going to hurt you because you agree with it. If you don’t believe it’s true… Somebody said something about me recently. Someone said I wasn’t warm and fuzzy and that I was cold and protected. Actually, it happened yesterday. And I found that really interesting because that isn’t how I see myself. And that person sees themselves as someone extremely warm and caring on the outside, yet I find them to be slightly manipulating and overly complimentary so that they want to kind of control what you think about them, right? So I just found that not that I… I mean, those of you that come to the event, you know this. And those of you that listen to my show, I think you feel me, right? You feel me. We vibrate on a different level. I don’t believe that I’m not warm and fuzzy. Not at all. I believe I’m extremely warm and fuzzy. But I’m also a very strong personality, and I also am very centered and focused and grounded most of the time. So for most people, that comes off as being cold because I’m not looking for external validation. So I’m not kissing your ass so that you tell me nice things about me because I don’t need you to tell nice things about me because I believe the nice things about me. Make sense?

So just remember that when someone says something negative about you and it hurts you, it’s because you have an agreement with them. And I would take that opportunity to either accept it or heal it. You have the choice. And you can say, “Okay, so I’m selfish.” There’s nothing wrong with being selfish. Selfish just means you’re focused inward on what it is you need. And let me tell you. Happy people who get their needs met are also very generous, uplifting, bright lights for the rest of us. Selfish doesn’t mean, even though a lot of people think it does, that I’m taking from you to give to me. That’s scarcity. If you understand that there is no scarcity, that everyone can be happy, everyone can be prosperous and there’s enough to go around, then I’m not taking anything away from you. Happiness is an inside job.

So another point in law of attraction, another phrase that I think is really important to bring to light, to have you guys remember right now also is that—get ready—anything that you want, anything you want, you think you want it because it will make you feel better in having it, right? More money. A relationship. You think that “If I have this thing, I’ll feel better.” That’s why you want that thing. But here’s the catch. You have to feel it before you’re in alignment with it to get it. And when you’re in alignment with the feeling, you don’t even need it. You can feel good now. You can feel powerful, abundant, loved right now. It’s about your point of focus and your point of attraction. Okay? Make sense?

So the minute we make conditions on things outside of ourselves, because it doesn’t matter what it is that you want. If you say, “I want a relationship and I’ll feel loved,” let me tell you, and I’m sure everybody else could tell you too, anybody in a long term relationship, that doesn’t mean you’re guaranteed to feel loved, because you can only feel loved if you are at the residence of love, which means you have to get yourself in the vibrational frequency of love for you to receive love. There are plenty of people I have given love to that I know don’t receive it because that is not what is activated in them most of the time. Yet I have my heart open and I’m giving love and I feel this immense amount of love. That’s why animals respond so honestly. I can tame the beast of Mr. Kitty who comes to my door to be fed, who for four years wouldn’t even slow down long enough for me to see him because he would run immediately. So it took four years to get him to stop, and then I started to feed him, then eventually he let me pet him, and now he comes to me and he stays for me. But it took a long time to build that trust. But then there are other cats, other female cats that they talk to me the minute they see me because they feel my love. They resonate with that part of me.

We let our heads get in the way so many times as humans. We let our conscious mind run these different stories and we have all this resistance to things, which stops us from allowing our cork to float and just be in alignment with that which is who we are. We are source energy. Let me remind you that you are source energy. You are not separate from God. God is the sun. You are a sunbeam. Every bit of you is the same as that which you call God, that which you call source, that which you call universe. The only difference is right now you’re focused physically in a body on this planet, and at the same time, still attached to the sun above and the universe above. We are never disconnected. And when you forget that and we’re not in alignment with that, and when you don’t feel that, that is the only connection that we all seek. Everything else that we seek is filler. Everything else we seek temporarily gives us a high, but most of it is not sustainable because a lot of it ends up being dependent on somebody else, on a condition, on a person’s behavior, on a person’s thoughts or feelings.

So I’ve been talking about law of attraction now for at least 30 minutes and I can’t wait to do this more at the next big step. But I wanted to bring this to you, and I hope this is helpful to you. Anytime you deflect and make it about somebody else’s stuff, it just means there’s still part of you that you’re not paying attention to, and the other part is that you’re not trusting the process. Trust, or choose to trust that everybody is on their journey and the best thing you can do for everyone on the planet, in your life, and in your future, is for you to be in alignment with you. You and source energy, that power will affect more people than anything else. I think Abraham says, “A person who is connected to source energy is more powerful than millions who are not.” So remember that. That is why this show, that’s why my mission, that’s why what I do is about empowering you, because can you say it’s about somebody else? “Well, that person yelled at me or that person hit me.” Yes, of course, you can. But how does that feel? It feels pretty shitty. It feels bad. And it doesn’t get better when you give your power away. It doesn’t mean you’re not going to get mad at other people. It doesn’t mean you’re not going to have boundaries. It doesn’t mean you’re going to ask for a response. You absolutely can ask for things from people or create a boundary that says, “This is not acceptable to me.”

I’ll give you one last story before I conclude today’s show. So I have a friend, and for a long time, I felt this resonance on a very deep level with this friend. There’s something familiar. Now, part of it, honestly, is that that friend represents some of the wounds and some of the energies from my past, without a doubt. But she’s in my present and she’s not part of my family. So it feels comfortable, but it wasn’t right long term. And in any friendship, when you start hanging out with people, you get to a place where you’ve exhausted the things you have in common. Just like in a relationship, it happens in relationships, when you’re dating and when you’re married, and at some point, there’s a separation of what you’re really interested in and who you really are, and what I’m interested in and who I really am in ways that might not be the same. The question then becomes what to do about it.

Now, in a marriage, I think and totally believe 100% that you choose your partner to heal the wounds of your past. So I would never recommend that someone says, “You know what? We’ve just outgrown ourselves. It’s time to get divorced.” I would never recommend that because you’re not learning your lesson, which means you’re just going to repeat it. But let’s put that down for a second and look at friendships. In the friendship model, you get to say, “What am I really interested in? What do I really want to talk about? Does this person really see me and vice-versa? Do I allow that person to be who they are? Am I allowing them their time and space, or am I trying to force them to be something that they’re not so that I have better connection with them?” When you allow people to be who they are, walking away sometimes is the best form of love you can do because you allow them to be who they are and allow them the space to grow or not. And you’re not trying to force them to be a certain way for you because that’s not fair. There are millions and billions of people on the planet. There are more people that are like you that are not like you. But for most of us, we haven’t found those people yet. And allowing yourself to continue having a high vibration will be the beacon that attracts those people to you.

Following the impulse. I started this show, I broke up my six-day-a-week podcast into six different shows from an impulse. An impulse that felt good because I practice law of attraction, because I trust my impulses. I trust when I have this very strong thought or feeling that I act on it. I did the Fit 2 Love Podcast back in 2014. I followed that as an impulse. But that impulse wasn’t completely the right one yet. It was the right one in the moment. It allowed me to have six shows, six different days of the week, six different themes. It allowed me the outlet to put all of my creative intentions and information and education in one place. And after two seasons and 350 shows, I felt like I got out all of the content that I wanted to put out at that moment. I was pumping out content, content, content for so long. So then I had to step back and reevaluate, and I realized, “You know what? I don’t think this is the right avenue. But yet it’s really good content. I’m very happy with the shows. I’m very happy with the content. So now what? What do I do?” And when I got the idea to repurpose, that’s what has become this huge tidal wave of showing me that my interests, the things that I care most deeply about, the way I want to live my life is what has attracted you to me.

But the journey has been about the trust. It’s not that I took an impulse, and all of a sudden, I got a million dollars. And by the way, I still don’t have a millions dollars, but I will. And if I don’t, that’s fine too. But do you understand that it’s like step by step? So it’s that journey that you’re taking, that you follow the impulse, you get your needs and feelings met, and you figure out what that is and you strategize that. You allow others to be who they are. And if you’re having a problem with somebody and you really want to change that relationship, then you use your point of focus to start tuning into the best parts of them or tuning into the best parts of what you want. If things are happening to you and you’re feeling lonely, you’re still focused on what is. It’s time to focus forward.

So I would recommend that all of you make a gratitude list or an appreciation journal every single night or every single day. And you can start off by writing what worked well for you today, but then the next section needs to be “I am looking forward to… I can’t wait to have this. I’m going to feel amazing when this and this and this,” or “I feel amazing because…” Actually, don’t make it future tense. Make it present tense. But start to generate these positive feelings that you so want to have but you’re waiting for others to comply with you. Never wait for others. Never wait for them. Make your own positive feelings. Take into consideration your point of attraction. Focus forward on what you want and allow others their journey of whether they’re going to stay with you or they’re not. They’re going to step up. You’re going to evoke better things from them with your attention to those better things.

But take an account to where you are. Ask yourself what you need, and let’s stop using others as our excuse to focus on ourselves in a negative way. Leverage these contrasting experiences to say “What do I need to do next? Oh, that’s what’s going on.” Why am I not getting progress? Because I keep allowing others and what others have to say to affect me and create resistance within me, versus I get to see it for what it is, which is really their stuff. It’s their stuff. And if it hurts my feelings, it’s also my stuff. So, boy, maybe my next step is starting to heal that. Let me go inward and take care of what it is inside of me so I don’t resonate with that anymore, so that I feel better about myself.

Okay. As you probably could guess, I could talk for another five hours about this topic. And maybe if you’re interested, if you want a free coaching session, we can do it on air together. Go to jjflizanes.com. Go to the free tools and resources, and there’s “Win a free session.” You could enter your name and information to win a free session. I eventually will get to start doing these in the next couple of weeks. I’m hoping end of March will be the first one. But we could do this together on air and share it with other people, so people can get and hear how we’re taking a situation and transforming it and allowing it to motivate us and move us forward and allowing this negative contrasting experience to do what it’s supposed to do, which is create a turning point for you. Remember, if you don’t take these small hints and allow them to move you forward, you will attract some big, hairy, inconvenient, expensive contrast that will force you to move forward because that’s what you want to do. But if you’re ignoring all the little signs along the way, you’re just maybe asking for something bigger to come along because you’re not paying attention. So let’s wake up and pay attention.

If you’re in my Releasing What Weighs You Down group or you’re in my manifestation challenge, feel free to comment to the group and mention something about this show if you have any other questions, and I’ll be happy to answer them either in the group or do another podcast. The next manifestation challenge, I’m not adding anybody new in—sorry—until May. So the earliest you’re going to get in is a week before at the end of April. But the next manifestation challenge is May. So I hope today helped some of you. I’d love to hear from you if it did. And remember that today’s show was sponsored by Health IQ. Please go to healthiq.com/spe. Take the quiz and get a quote and see if it saves you money because you choose to live a healthier lifestyle. So I look forward to connecting with you again next week.